Happy Last Day of 2006!

I swear, it was just New Years Eve 2005. Wasn't it? What happened to 2006? Where did it go? I mean seriously.....Well, Happy New Years Eve everyone. For those of you stupid enough to go out tonight (and you know who you are), please be very careful. Watch the other guy. Don't be the other guy. I'll be participating in Losers Night In at my friend Carrie's house. There is nothing like playing drunken board games. I am soooo there.

I suppose I'm ready for 2007 (not that I have much of a choice, mind you). I'm trying to be hopeful that it will be a good year. I'm hopeful I'll get my act together (I'm a work in progress-but aren't we all?). I'll be with my friend Mike for the Quest for Love 2007 (we'll both be looking for good, decent men that are worthy of us, right Mikey???). I'm hopeful that happens, because, let's face it, I ain't gettin' any younger......

Another holiday weekend-LOVE IT!

Ok, so last night at the crisis line it was kinda boring. We were going 30-45 minutes in between calls, that is, until my last 10 minutes of my shift (of course). I ended up getting out of there nearly 30 minutes late, got home at 11pm, fell asleep sometime after midnight and was up again at 6:20am. I'm a little sleepy today. But hyper.

I am heading to Salem after work tonight to help take care of my invalid mother. She initially told me she didn't need me to come down, however, called me back about 20 minutes later and said "yea, dad says it may be a good idea for you to go ahead and come down". I think he may be tired of playing nursemaid........I don't mind though. It's my mommy. I'll probably come back to STL for New Years Eve, although I don't really plan to go out. My friend Carrie is hosting Losers Night In, so I may attend that. I've really only gone out for New Years twice in my life-once in 1999 when the world was supposedly gonna end the moment it turned 2000-I figured may as well party it up one last time. The other time was last year with J. I remember very early in the evening (probably around 8 or 9pm), J asked me if I intended to drink Captain Morgan all night (I'd already had quite a few), I'm sure I said "yes". I remember doing shots with strangers at the bar and making lots of new friends. I know I made it to midnight, but probably not much afterward and I do remember passing out once home. Good times. None of that behavior this year.

My favorite pic

This is me and Princess Stubby after the harrowing journey to Salem on Christmas Day. No, Stubby wasn't on the trip, but clearly she was having sympathy pains and she passed out with me. Isn't she great?

More Christmas pics

My dad and grandpa

This is my cousin Brian's little boy, Hunter. He has spaghetti all over his face. He is toooo cute!

Here's my brother, Tim, being "cool" as usual....

This is my dad and his siblings. L to R: Aunt Angie, dad, Uncle Terry

2006-a year in review. Get your kleenex out now.

2006. What a year. It was good, it was bad, it was ugly sometimes, but regardless, I wouldn't change a thing. I know that sounds surprising, but one thing I have learned is that even bad stuff can teach you a lot about yourself. It really does build character and make you stronger. A lot happened to me this year. Some of the highlights:
1. I got to fall head over heels in love (truly for the first time in my life).
2. I turned 30 and it wasn't as horrible as I imagined it would be. Now, 31 on the otherhand...
3. I got my first tattoo (still don't regret it!).
4. I finally got rid of the Crapalier and got a brand new 2006 Mazda 3-and I still love it!
5. I left the crisis line after 6 years to sell out and work for a managed care company, only to return to the crisis line on a part time basis in November.
6. Lastly, but certainly not least, I got to get my first ever broken heart. Doesn't that sound like fun? I don't recommend it.

I learned some valuable lessons this year. I've learned that it's ok to fall in love and let yourself trust another person-even if you are opening yourself up to potentially get hurt. I've learned that turning 30 isn't so bad after all. It really is just a number. I've learned that, as much as it hurts, a broken heart isn't a totally bad thing. It forces you to think about what's really important in life and allows you to look at yourself and make positive changes in your life. I've learned to never take my family and friends for granted. Never will I let something or someone get in the way of the people that will always be there for me no matter what. I've learned that I actually am a relationship person. I always thought they weren't for me, but I actually like being all domestic and stuff and now just have to find the right person for me. I've learned that I'm ok being by myself too. I've learned that I am really good at what I do for a living and it's ok to think so. I've learned it's ok to do shots at 11am with your Grandpa.

Truthfully, if there were some things I could change about this past year, I'd consider it. Certainly I would not have chosen to have my heart broken, or to be so unhappy for so many months that I wasn't even myself anymore, or to disappoint my family and friends, but, then again, if those things hadn't happened, I wouldn't be where I am today. And where is that, you may ask? Well, its a pretty good place. Gone is the depressed, unhappy me. The silly, sarcastic me is back. My focus is on today and the future, not the past. Yes, overall, the events of 2006 have made me a better person. I can't wait to see what life lessons are in store for 2007! But for the love of God, please no more broken hearts-I can't take it!

Christmas 2006 pics

Here is Grandpa with all six of his kids. TOP: Aunt Mary, Aunt Jan, mom and Aunt Cheryl. BOTTOM: Aunt Paula, Grandpa and Uncle Jimmy.

This is all the grandkids on my mom's side of the family-well, all but Ben who is stationed in Qatar . TOP: Clint, Jeff, Mike, Tim. MIDDLE: Red, Jackie, Rachel and me. BOTTOM: Grant, Kelli holding Clint's daughter Kira, Chelsea and Patrick. We are a big clan, that's for sure! And look, all those kids are taller than me. Pretty sad.

Here is my little family. Aren't we cute? From left: my sister Kristy and her husband Jon, my dad, my mom, my brother Tim and me

Here is Grandpa with his great granddaughter, Kira, who is 4 and a little wild woman (must get that from her daddy, huh Clint?).

Good news-my mom lived through her surgery

Not being melodramatic at all..........no, seriously, my mom did have surgery this morning. She is apparently doing well and I am sure is enjoying her new script for pain meds...now the fun begins. See, my mother is not the most well behaved patient in the world (you know it's true mother, don't lie!). The last time she had this shoulder surgery done, she threw the imobilizer across the room at one point and refused to do her physical therapy. And I won't even get into the time she refused to drink the chalky stuff for her colonoscopy (I'm pretty sure she may have said some curse words to the tech). My dad may be in for a long week....Again, if she is still doing icky this weekend, I'll come home and relieve dad of his nursing duties (and maybe snag some Vicodin or something. Payment for all my hard work, don't you know?).

Happy Boxing Day, Canada!

I don't know what in the hell Boxing Day is since I'm a yankee and all, but they celebrate it in Canada, so to my dear friend Canada (some may know him as "RP"), hope you had a great Boxing Day! Hope you had a great Christmas too. Your card is in the mail, I swear! Miss you! Joyeux Noel mon ami! (did I spell that right? My French is a little rusty....)

I am worn out

The holidays are tiring, aren't they? Between having the flu (or whatever it was I had) and the various family gatherings, I am beat. I didn't throw up today, so I consider that a good sign. Still feel icky and tired though. HUGE THANKS to Uncle Ron and Clint for bringing that couch by tonight. I know it was quite a haul to South City from Wentzville. I appreciate it much-love you guys! I now have Grandpa's old couch in my close-to-empty living room. It matches the plaid couch real well, let me tell ya. Ugh, my apartment is a mess, I still haven't unpacked. But all I want to do is take a shower and go to bed. Is that wrong at 8:50pm? I don't think it is....Maybe I'll have more energy tomorrow.

Had a good dinner tonight with mom and dad, Red and Jon and Jon's parents (thanks mom and dad!). And I got to see my niece Chloe, always a good time.

Mommy-I love you. I know your surgery tomorrow will be fine. Please be a good patient and don't curse at any of the nurses, ok? Get your script for your pain meds filled and get yourself home. Remember, I'll come home this weekend if you need the help! Dad-may the force be with you. She's a tough patient! :)

Nothing like hurlin' on Christmas Day

Uhhhhh......yea. I told you I didn't feel good. You know it's bad when I am begging dad to pull off the highway to stop at a public rest stop-so I can throw up. Now, I do have a tendency to get car sick, but never actually get physically sick. Until today. It was ugly. I'll spare you the details. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever eat deer sausage again. Ugh.

Other than that, Christmas was good. Christmas Eve last night at Aunt Jan's was fun. No one got drunk though, I'm a little disappointed in that. Everyone was there except for my cousin Ben, who is still stationed in Qatar (how do you spell it???). Tim and I hung with the little cousins and watched "A Christmas Story" ("you'll shoot your eye out!"). Dinner was great, my deviled eggs were a hit (duh!). I got lots of great stuff-as usual, my mom and dad were WAY too good to me (Bath and Body Works stuff, candles, my favorite lip gloss, jammies, gift certificates....). I got a framed poem from Grandpa about grand-daughters, almost made me cry (I have been very teary the last few days....), it was really sweet. We did the annual family photos by the Christmas tree (Michael and I reminisced about the first Christmas with grandchildren-it was just me and him, sure, we weren't even a year old, but we were the original grandchildren! Sadly, that was 30 freakin' years ago).

After a sleepless night at Grandpa's last night, we trekked on over to St. Charles to see the Davidson side of the family. There were a whole lotta Davidson's in one room, kinda scary. I think I will finally get my windshield fixed-my cousin Brian works at the Glass Doctor, he said he could replace my windshield for $50. Where do I sign???? All my cousin's kids are so cute-that baby Hunter was precious! It was great to see everyone. We left mid afternoon to head to Salem (why did I go to Salem, you may ask? Well, it's simple. The thought of sitting in my apartment by myself on Christmas night was just too depressing to take. Mom and dad suggested I come home with them since they are coming back to St. Louis on Tuesday for Mom's surgery, so, here I am in Salem). Driving down Hwy 44, I felt a bit nauseated, but figured I'd just go to sleep. No such luck. As I sit here now, watching Deal or No Deal with the fam, I am feeling much better (throwing up everything you've eaten that day will do that to ya). Stubby is happy to have her humans home. I hope to have some Christmas pictures up here soon. Especially the one mom took of me and Stubby passed out on the bed. It was nice.

Merry Christmas to everyone. Hope your day was better than mine!

Happy friggin' Christmas Eve!

No, I'm not really angry and bitter. "Friggin" is one of my dad's favorite words (yes, he has lived in the country for too long), so, today's title is an ode to my daddy.

Well, happy Christmas Eve to all! What have I done so far today? Well, glad you asked. I slept in until 9am (oooohhh.....), I then completed the msnbc crossword AND the jigsaw puzzle (I know, I rock), I did some laundry and now I am blogging to the sounds of Lionel Ritchies Greatest Hits (hey, don't knock it until you try it, alright?). Reading over this paragraph, I realize just how sad my life has become. Wow. Why didn't anyone tell me???? I had no clue......

Anyway, I'm chillin' at home until my parents and brother get in town. We are having the Baumgartner Family Christmas tonight at Aunt Jan's house. Between now and then I will have to work up the energy to shower and actually get dressed (I didn't change out of my pajamas at all yesterday. Pretty pathetic, huh?). After the family fun times, we'll go to church for the candlelight service (my favorite-there is just something about the entire church singing "Silent Night" with nothing but candles lighting the church. I love it). Tomorrow, we will be venturing out to St. Charles to visit the Davidson side of the family. There is nothing scarier than a good 25-30 Davidson's in one room. Seriously. After that, my family will go home and I will go home to my empty apartment and be all alone on Christmas night. Sounds pretty sad, huh? It actually kinda is......

Christmas funny

Happy Birthday Rachel!

Happy 14th Birthday to my little cousin, Rachel! Hope you are having a great day sweetie! See you tomorrow!





Luv,


your really old cousin

no mono y mono

Well, I don't have mono. Guess I just have Feel Like Crap NOS (for those that don't know, NOS stands for Not Otherwise Specified-we use it in the psych world a lot). So, I have gone to my doctor for eight years now. Never once has he, himself, called me at home. Well, he did today. Now either he gave all the nurses and secretaries the day off, or he was really concerned about me. He called to let me know my blood test came back normal and that he wanted to see how I was doing because I didn't look like I was doing too well yesterday (I guess I really looked like hell-why didn't anyone tell me???). He encouraged me to call his exchange if I felt any worse. Well, today, I did go to work and I am feeling somewhat better. My personal theory is that it was a combo of not enough sleep, working two jobs and not eating very much. Lesson learned-you can only push yourself so far until you crash. Consider me crashed. I am still way tired and have this really annoying scratchy throat which makes me cough every 30 seconds, but other than that, I think I'll live. I can tell I'm still way weak though as I tried to take out the trash today. Now, I know I am not a very strong girl, in fact, I'm pretty much a wuss (although I do like to kick!), but normally I can manage to carry out the trash. Well, today it felt like it weighed 700 pounds. I was out of breath by the time I got to the trash cans outside. Uh....yea. We got to leave work early today (LOVE managed care!), so I am home now. I plan to just rest tonight and tomorrow, although my apartment really needs to be cleaned, so if I can work up the energy, I'm gonna do that tomorrow. FYI y'all, I am so smart I got the Final Jeopardy question right today. The answer was Rosa Parks-why the hell I knew the answer I don't know, and I don't remember the question, but just let it be known that I ROCK! Well, it's almost 4:00, think I'll go and see if Oprah is any good today. Later peeps.

Leaving early

OMG, I forgot to tell you the best part about being sick. Since I last saw my doctor about 5-6 weeks ago, I have lost SIX pounds! Isn't that exciting? I think it is......Anyway, everyone is crazed with the holiday spirit at work today. Mike is singing "Oh Tannenbaum" as we speak....I really am not feeling the holiday spirit, maybe because I haven't been feeling well. I just want it over with already (the holidays and my sickness. I realize the whole "sick in the head" part won't go away any time soon). Our director is letting us leave as soon as our cases are done today, which is way cool. I still have 5 of 12 left to do. Not too bad considering it's only 11:30am. I plan on doing a whole lotta nothing tonight and Saturday. Hopefully just rest and be feeling better for Christmas Eve.

I hope everyone has a great holiday. Be watching for Kerri's Annual Sappy End of the Year Message, coming soon to a blog near you.......

Who wants some mono?

Ok, I don't know for sure if I have mono, but my doctor wants to rule it out. All my symptoms match. I don't have strep throat-guess that's good news. I don't know how in the hell I could have caught "The Kissing Disease", since my lame ass hasn't kissed anyone in quite some time (it's sad but true, I may as well get some cats now, because I am gonna be the lonely old maid who only has her cats for companionship). My doctor made me eat while I was in his office. Has this ever happened to anyone else? He was like "your color doesn't look too good". Well, I was too tired to make a joke about my pasty white girl skin..so next thing I know a nurse is coming in with cookies and pretzels and stands there and watches me to make sure I eat them (I suddenly felt like perhaps I was in the middle of some interview for an eating disorder screening or something). I assured the doctor that I had eaten today, not a lot, and I really haven't eaten much in the last week or so (I'm too tired to even walk to the kitchen). So, in order to draw my blood, the nurse made me lay down and she kept me talking so I wouldn't faint (I got to hear all about her drug addict daughter and how she is raising her own grandchildren...). The good news is, I didn't faint, but my doctor still made me lay there for like 10 minutes and made the nurse follow me to my car. Geez people! I was getting a little anxious seeing my doctor so concerned about me, and the nurse even said "he doesn't do that for just anybody"-meaning having her walk me to my car. He doesn't want me going to work tomorrow, I'm still on the fence. I feel like I can get through one more day of work because I then have the next four days off. Of course, if I have mono, I could feel like crap for weeks. And there is no medicine for it. All I can do is take Tylenol for my fever and get lots of sleep. Sure, between my two jobs and the holidays coming up, I'm sure I'll get right on that.....

KD can't talk...QUICK! Someone mark this date down!

Yea, KD is quiet today. The effort it takes to talk is just too much for me today. My supervisor is concerned that I may have strep throat, so I will be going to my doctor this afternoon. That's what happens when you work for a bunch of nurses.....I am still extremely tired and really just want to sleep. I am supposed to go to my part time job tonight. I told them that if my doctor pronounces me not contagious, I am working. Hey, I got bills to pay! So what if I can't talk, and my part time job is, uh....talking on the crisis line....details, people, details.

Sick Day

Uh yea....it's after 11am on a Wednesday and I just got up. I'm home from work sick, people! And not sick in the head, like usual. I knew I haven't felt right all week. I'd been overwhelmingly tired since Saturday. I thought it was because I went out all weekend and am too damn old for that, but when I still felt that way Monday and Tuesday, I knew whatever illness was going around had caught up with me. I called my boss at 5:30 this morning (why I was awake at that time, I have no idea) and let them know I was staying home today.

I am so tired I can barely move. I have the typical head cold stuff: ears stuffed up, whole head hurts, coughing up crap, you know. And I have ZERO energy. Now, it used to be a long running family joke that KD always got really sick on or around Christmas. Every year, without fail, I'd usually have some sort of sinus infection or something. The last couple of years, I had been illness free. Well, I guess not anymore. Hopefully, this will pass before Christmas. I can't imagine feeling this crappy for another five days.....

In better news, our Christmas party for my team at work last night was fun, even if I was kinda out of it and freezing (fever, anyone?). My Secret Santa ended up being Mikey-poo. Mikey-you were an awesome Secret Santa. Supplied me with Diet Coke often. In fact, he even delivered it himself one day, saying "uh, this is from your Secret Santa". Nice. The best gift was the pad of post-it notes I got. It has a picture of a man and a woman and it says "We ended the relationship as friends. You can email him at lying-cheating-son-of-a-bitch.com". Isn't that hilarious? Ok, maybe the best gift were the mini bottles of alcohol that Melissa brought....yea, I scored three mini bottles of Captain Morgan, and I ain't sharin'!

Ok, I've been awake for 30 minutes now. I think it's about time to pop some Dayquil and go back to bed. Nighty night!

I just can't do it

Everyone is REALLY hyper today at work. I want to be hyper, I'm in a good mood, I just can't do it. I don't feel good. And I'm gonna be a big whiny baby about it. Mike is singing Christmas carols, Amy's Ritalin hasn't kicked in yet and everyone has been eating cookies since 8:00 this morning (today was my teams cookie exchange. As the team Scrooge, I refused to participate. I have two reasons for this: 1. I don't bake, and 2. I really don't need six dozen cookies for my fat ass). After work we are all going to dinner together on the company. My fat ass doesn't turn down free food. That's crazy talk. I will have to cut my dinner short, however, because I also have book club tonight. Our annual Christmas book club. We always do a gift exchange as well as a white elephant gift exchange (you find some random crap around your house and re-gift it). A very lucky girl will be getting my white elephant gift-it ROCKS!

MTinni2-the answer to your question is YES, I'll be your regular drinking buddy! We do have some fun when we go out, don't we?.....I can't believe our supervisor thinks one of us may end up in jail. I have suggested passing around a jar to collect money for our Bail Fund. Whaddya think?

why am I so sleepy?

I cannot shake this overwhelming tiredness today. I don't know what the deal is. Probably didn't help that I worked 13 hours today, but oh well. Finally got my paycheck issue straightened out at my part time job (apparently, they found it unnecessary to pay me for my time served). I just had the realization that I only have to work 3 days next week-thats good times. I really don't have much to say today. My brain is working less than usual.

backbone, anyone?

Ok, the new and improved KD definitely has a backbone these days. I'm not taking any s**t from anyone anymore. Some may call that being a b*tch, I call it finally standing up for yourself after 30 years of being a door mat. I'm not gonna go around being a b*tch just for the fun of it (thats just mean!), but you are definitely gonna know what I think. I think that is the greatest thing I've learned in this last year is how to stand up for myself. I may have even ended a friendship over it tonight, but I don't care (the person I'm referring to knows who they are and knows they were wrong and inappropriate, so if this friendship ends, I'll know I did nothing wrong). This KD means business.

wild weekend?

I am soooooo sleepy. Seriously, I am too old to go out drinking both Friday and Saturday nights. But at least I had fun!

Grandpa's birthday celebration was fun. Poor guy, he didn't get any cards in the mail from us (because we were surprising him at his house) and he thought we forgot his birthday! :( When he came home, there were about 20 of us hiding in the kitchen, trying to be quiet (tough with a 4 year old and a dog). Grandpa walked in his living room and said "is someone here?". Then Aunt Mary's dog, Sophia, went running into the living room and Grandpa said "I got a dog???". Well, we busted out laughing after that! I think he liked his new couch-you did a nice job fam! I was so happy to get to see my cousin Clint-I didn't know he was already in town. I hung out with the fam for a bit, then swung by my friend Mike's house and headed out to see Uncle Jimmy play. The new band sounded great! We had a great time. Did some dancing, did some drinking. Now I'm at my part time job and I am wayyy sleepy. I still have 4.5 hours to go.....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRANDPA!!!

Today is my Grandpa's 79th birthday! Grandpa is my favoritest guy on Earth. I love you soooooo much Grandpa! Hope you have a wonderful birthday, and hope you don't kill your kids when you see that they've replaced all your living room furniture.......

Love,
Kerri-bird

bad, bad thoughts....

I had thoughts of harming others again today. I know it's my own fault for putting off my Christmas shopping until the 16th of December. But it was their fault too for being in my way. All of these bad thoughts were at my first stop of the day.....and I hadn't even made it to the mall yet. Not a good sign. I became intolerant of salespeople asking if they could help me (if I wanted your help, I'd make eye contact and ask). It was a bad combination of too many people in one place, noise and being hung over (hey, what can I say, Girls Night Out last night was a success!). My trip to the mall wasn't as horrible as I thought it would be (although, when I was at Bath and Body Works, I really did envision myself stabbing someone-not that I have a weapon, mind you). I figured after all that stress, the least I could do was buy myself a new pair of shoes......so I did. A really cute pair of tall brown boots....for $20. Can't beat that with a stick! So most of my Christmas shopping is done. I have a couple of other things to get, but I definitely made great progress today. My parents will be here in about an hour or so, I'm meeting up with them at Red and Jon's then we are all heading out to Grandpa's house to celebrate his birthday. Then, I will be going out again (two nights in a row? KD is OUT OF CONTROL!). Tomorrow may be a little rough......

P.S. I'd like to wish J a Happy Un-Anniversary!

Happy Birthday Anita Baker!

Happy birthday to my good friend Anita! I miss you girl! Guess I'll see you at your wedding in a couple of months! Luv ya!

I was right

I was right about it being a bad day. UGH! At one point I about started breaking down crying (funny, one of my hospital contacts said he felt like doing the same thing). There was lots of talk about just going home and drinking (NO, I am not drinking at this moment in time). Then there was a time when I just sat and laughed because the alternative was to cry. I think I'm just tired. That, and at 2:40pm, I realized I hadn't eaten a thing all day. Unless Diet Coke counts. So, no wonder I was a little stressed, cranky, and had a headache.

The good news is-tomorrow is Friday and I have LOTS of fun plans for the weekend. Girl's Nite Out is tomorrow night (there will be some sailing with the Captain, I'm sure). Saturday my parents will be in town to celebrate Grandpa's birthday (I know it's a surprise, but I'm almost 100% sure Grandpa doesn't read my blog) and Saturday night my friend Mike and I are going to see Uncle Jimmy's country band play. Sunday may not be so much fun as I am working at the crisis line for six hours, but that's ok! Now, if I could just get through tomorrow.......

confusion is a state of mind

I woke up with a headache today, never a good sign for the rest of your day. Plus, we had an 8am training at work. Now, who is really paying attention at 8am? Certainly not me. I can't comprehend much of anything until at least 10am-minimum. Sometimes, it's longer than that. Sometimes, a whole day goes by and I haven't comprehended a thing. Actually, come to think of it, that's most days.......

Either I'm having my first psychotic break, or I need to start getting some more sleep....

Seriously, I think I am hallucinating things. Today, in the parking lot at work, I thought I saw a cat. Turns out, it was a pile of snow. Then, at the crisis line tonight, I was on the elevator, and part of the wall was coming off (scary, I know, it was some sort of padding that was coming off) and I kept thinking there was a person standing next to me when it was really just the peeling wall. Then, driving home tonight, I thought I saw a shooting star which turned out to be a light reflection off my window. Then I really did see a cat. A tail-less one at that. Yes, I think I am finally losing my mind. I know, some may think I lost it a long time ago, and you may be right about that. All I know now is that it's 11pm and I am still wide awake. And I don't have cable.

Humor for us mental health professionals.....

Christmas songs for the mentally ill:

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are
3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas
4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and.....
6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me
7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy - oooh look at the froggy - can I have a chocolate - why is France so far away?
10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Amy kicked me out of her cubicle

Apparently, I am too hyper this morning because Amy kicked me out of her cubicle. I just don't understand it. She sent me down to Mike's cubicle, but I think I was too hyper for him too. They hate me because I'm 30 and they're not (HA! HA! They're 31!!!!). I just can't help it. KD is rarely in a bad mood these days (which is a really, really good thing for all involved). My new philosophy is-why be unhappy? It's just not fun. It only brings you and the people around you down. Now, I just need to learn how to tone down the hyperness. I blame the first-thing-in-the-morning-Diet Coke. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. I better conserve some of my energy thought because I gotta work 13 hours today (5 at the crisis line). There's nothing wrong with leaving your house at 7am and not returning until 11pm, is there??????

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH!

Happy Birthday today to my friend Sarah. Hope you have a great day girl! Have Russ watch the kids and go get a manicure or something! :)

I'm sleepy today. Maybe it's the cloudy weather, maybe it was the 12 hour workday yesterday, I don't know, but whatever it is, I'm sleepy. At least I'm not working tonight. Maybe I'll just go home and go to bed. Doesn't that sound fun?

Tanya and I have been planning our Girls Night Out for Friday. It had to be rescheduled due to the ice storm a couple weeks back. But this week-IT IS ON! We are even gonna get dressed up and look all cute and have a good time! I soooooo cannot wait. And my precious Mikey and I are going out Saturday night. Sounds like a fun filled weekend for sure!

Well, must get back to the daily crossword puzzle now......later people! :)

Sign of a long day?

OMG, even though I am hormonal and PMS-y, I am soooo way hyper today. I have laughed more in the first hour of being at work than I did all weekend (except for when Carrie, Erin and I were singing "Last Christmas" by George Michael and "No Scrubs" by TLC yesterday). Yea, it's gonna be a long day. And I haven't even finished my first Diet Coke yet.....and my Secret Santa left me another Diet Coke on my desk....LOVE IT! Let's hope this good mood continues as I have to put in another four hours at my part-time job tonight. Nothing like working TWELVE hours with my good friend Amy (it really isn't right for anyone involved that we work two jobs together. Just not right). I am a bit concerned, however, because I have a bit of a sore throat, swollen glands, and a sinus headache. I'm sure I'm fine though.........

uneventful weekend

Not really much to say today. Fairly uneventful weekend. Although, I did have fun helping Erin house hunt-we found one today that may be a keeper! Yay Ern!

Tomorrow starts yet another work week. I'm working 15 hours at my part-time job this week, so KD is gonna be a little busy. I will definitely be looking forward to Girl's Night Out on Friday, seeing my mommy and the rest of the fam on Saturday and seeing Uncle Jimmy's new country band on Saturday as well. Next weekend should be fun. Keeing KD busy is gonna be the name of the game. Got it, people?

Well, I'm gonna go put my jammies on (so what if it's only 6:45pm!) and go read. You're jealous of my life, aren't you? :)

Jason Marquis? Really?

Was that necessary? Didn't he suck last season? Well, now he is on my precious Cubbies. I've been impressed with their off season deals so far, but I'm not so sure about this one...

Grandpa and the mannequin

I never want to hear my grandfather making inappropriate comments about the mannequins in the short skirts and telling his grand daughters that he is "hard up" EVER again! Needless to say, a trip to the mall with grandpa is never lacking in entertainment. Nor is taking him to IHOP for his birthday lunch.....lunch was going fine until our very sweet waitress asked what grandpa's name was, then all of a sudden every single IHOP employee started clapping and requesting the entire restaurant pay attention and help celebrate Bob's birthday. Then they proceeded to sing this hip hop version of "Happy Birthday". Grandpa got into it-even clapped some himself. My sister and I just sat there and laughed. Wow. No wonder I have a massive headache right now. Oh wait, maybe I have a headache because of the shot of peppermint schnapps Grandpa made us do at 11:00 in the morning!!!!! Yea, that may have something to do with it. Nothing like getting your buzz on before dining at IHOP......After that, I helped my friend Erin house hunt. Our friend Carrie is a real estate agent, so we went driving around looking at places-it was way fun. Maybe someday I'll be a big girl and be ready to buy a house. Someday. Right now, I think I'm gonna lay down because seriously, my head freakin' hurts.

Oh, J, hope you are recovering from your surgery. Don't take too many Vicodin mister!!!!!!!

some inappropriate holiday humor

The poll is back baby!

The mini poll has made a comeback. Please make sure you cast your vote. It is a VERY important topic! If anyone has any good poll ideas, let me know!

My crack

I'm talking about the crack in my windshield by the way. You people are sick!!!! Anyway, my crack is spreading (enter inappropriate joke here). It is almost all the way across. Yea, I know I should get it fixed but at this point, I wanna see how far the little sucker will get. It's kinda like an Olympic sport watching it (that, or I really, really need to do more with my spare time while driving-like, I don't know, paying attention to THE ROAD). I'm entertained by my crack and I hope you are too. If you want to see it, let me know.

eat your heart out ladies!

This is my friend Canada. Isn't he hot? You regretting sending this to me yet, Canada?????

dude

That 22 year old guy from Saturday night called me again today. I mean, I know I'm irresistable and all (stop laughing!) but geez! I thought after I didn't call him back on Sunday he would figure it out. Everyone says I should call him back, but here's my theory. I am too damn old to date just for the sake of dating. Not like I want to get married tomorrow, but I am not gonna waste my time dating a guy I know I will have no future with-like a 22 year old. Is it too late to join a convent?

I am totally street

See Canada, I have total street cred living in the city. I mean, after all, St. Louis is THE MOST DANGEROUS CITY IN AMERICA. It's true. We finally beat out Detroit. It's been a long time coming, but our number of rapes, murders and car jackings finally took Detroit down to 2nd place. Suckers.

Oh Canada

Canada and I finally made contact last night. Nothing like a TWO HOUR phone call, eh? It felt like five minutes as we reminisced about the good ol' days, laughed at my laughable life (because, really, who isn't laughing at me right about now?), and just chit-chatted like we talk everyday (nevermind that the last time we did actually talk was my birthday in February). Canada-you always were one of the people that could make me laugh no matter what. The two of us are just equally goofy-probably why we get along so well. That, and, as you know, the Canadians are a friendly people. You have to like them. It's like an international law or something. Anyway, Canada kept this old lady awake until midnight (GASP!). But it was well worth it to talk to an old friend! I miss you Canada!

Is it wrong?

Is it wrong, that every time I watch The Biggest Loser I want to eat? What is that saying about me? Do I need to go on the show? (I'm seriously doubting so, I have yet to go over my magic "never again" weight, so I think I'm ok-FOR NOW). Maybe it's watching them all work so hard and stuff-makes me hungry, I don't know. Anyway, I LOVE that show. Of course, again tonight, I cried. I don't think a week has gone by that I haven't cried during that show. I'm a sap, what can I say (that, and, unfortunately for me and the rest of the world-PMS has reared her ugly head once again-bitch). The season finale is next week and I am PISSED because I have to work at the crisis line. And no, I am not cool enough to have Tivo, or DVR or even know how to use my VCR to record it, so I'm gonna have to get creative. Anyone have any suggestions (besides telling me to join the 21st century)?

Kerri's Rant and Rave of the day: Has this ever happened to you? You've decided a nice way to end your long, stressful day would be to relax in a nice, hot bath. Doesn't that sound nice? You run the water, maybe put some bubbles in, grab a good book (because, you're relaxing-you're gonna be in there awhile, ok?). You get ready to get in the tub, eager with anticipation, only to discover-THE F***ING WATER IS COLD.

Restroom signs-a funny ha ha

Friends don't let friends take home ugly men-Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE

Beauty is only a light switch away-Perkins Library, Duke University , Durham , NC

If life is a waste of time,and time is a waste of life,then let's all get wasted together and have the time of our lives-Armand's Pizza, Washington , DC

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity-The Bayou, Baton Rouge , LA

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit-Men's Room,Linda's Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill , NC

Express Lane:Five beers or less-Sign over one of the urinals, Ed De bev ic's, Phoenix , AZ

You're too good for him-Sign over mirror in Women's restroom at Ed De bev ic's, Beverly Hills , CA

No wonder you always go home alone-Sign over mirror in Men's restroom,Ed De bev ic's, Beverly Hills , CA

A Woman's Rule of Thumb:If it has tires or testicles,you're going to have trouble with it- Women's restroom at Dick's Last Resort, Dallas , TX

they said it couldn't be done....

After nearly four days at home, I finally did it. Yes, folks, I went into the kitchen. And cooked. I know it's a rare phenonmenon (especially nowadays. I always cooked for J-but now that it's just me-I really don't give a crap), but, I was able to do it. It may not happen again for another couple of months, but that's ok (I think it's really because 1. I hate doing dishes and 2. I'm really, really lazy. Cereal is much easier).

The apartment is fairly clean. The trash still needs to be taken out (told you I was lazy). I've read all my magazines, I have one book left I can read. Yep-I'm ready to go back to work tomorrow. Is that sad? Probably.

What is a girl to do?

Well, I'm off work today and tomorrow and I'm already bored. Not stir crazy-gotta get out of the house-bored, but "gee, I really don't have anything to do" bored. Not that I'm complaining. I mean sure, there are about 8 loads of laundry to do, the trash needs to be taken out, the apartment overall needs a good cleaning, but none of that is fun. I will finish reading my People magazine (because I care whether or not Prince William is going to marry his girlfriend, ok????). I have a couple books I could read. I'm looking forward to watching the American Music Awards tonight-Rascal Flatts is nominated for all kinds of stuff-I'd like to see them win because they rock. Reading back over this, I realize just how sad and pathetic I sound....wow. I guess Canada was right-I really am a Grandma (thanks for that one, Mr. Tessier! Just because I requested no phone calls after 10pm-on a school night!).

Someone come over and make me do my laundry. Please? I can't go in that creepy basement alone. Jo Jo The Clown might get me.......

Yep, girl's still got it!

Uh....yea....Erin and I had some fun last night (gotta be a fun night when you don't get home until after 5:00am!). I'll spare you most of the details, but let's just start calling me Demi Moore, ok? Yes, that's right, good ol' KD got hit on by a 22 year old! NIIIIIIICE, huh? It was so very weird to be even talking to another guy, I was kinda freaked out by it, but managed to live through it. The guy has already called me today-which totally freaked me out. I don't plan on calling him back (really not trying to be bitchy, I swear). I'm just clearly not ready to be back in the dating scene quite yet. But I've now made progress.....Me, Erin and Captain Morgan were really good friends last night. It was just good to be out and talking to people and having fun. Of course, now I am sleep deprived and tired and am currently at work at the crisis line. Only four more hours to go....Luckily, I'm not working at my full time job Monday or Tuesday (due to some "use it or lose it" time off days left), so I will get plenty of rest....and clean my apartment....and do laundry.

In fun news, my friend Canada called me today! We are now officially playing phone tag. Canada-it was just so nice to hear your voice! I can't wait to talk to you so you can make fun of my hick accent! You know I won't make fun of you-I'm a sucker for a Canadian accent! :)

Well, back to work. Later all.

Luv,
Demi

Good Luck, J!

Just wanted to wish Jesse luck in his big fight tonight. He told me I couldn't say "break a leg", so I won't (apparently, that really isn't a nice thing to say to someone when it could really happen).....anyway, just be REALLY careful getting there, ok? Good luck, have fun, kick some ass, get home safely.

Congrats on the new baby, Stephen!!!

Just wanted to congratulate my friend Stephen. His wife have a beautiful baby boy, Michael Stephen, yesterday. I saw some pics-he is tooooo cute (like their other three kids). Hope all is well with your beautiful little family Stephen! See you soon!

Whew-no more chocolate covered espresso beans for me!

Dude, my heart feels like it's gonna pound out of my chest, thanks to Amy's chocolate covered espresso beans (that, and the two 20 oz. Diet Coke's I've had thus far today....). Wow. At least i won't fall asleep during my two hour drive home (well, I hope it doesn't take two hours)!!!!!!!!!!

To everyone who did not go to work today

I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This has been a public service announcement from Kerri M. Davidson, Angry and Bitter Woman of the Year, 2006

Drivin' in a winter wonderland....or something like that

Uh, yea.........there is a tree in my yard right now. Good times. I was praying that my cell phone was gonna ring this morning and it would be my supervisor telling me we didn't have to come in-that didn't happen, however, so here I am, at work. It only took me an hour and a half to get here. Didn't think I'd make it at first as I couldn't move my car from it's parking spot. But I got out and the drive was fairly uneventful. We have a skeleton crew at work today. Those of us that made it are the survivors-the toughest of the tough. We are actually gonna get all our cases done and high-tail it home. We pleaded to our hospitals to call us early, mine, however, are not real sympathetic as they are all in Kansas City and they got hit with the same crappy weather we did. SO not fun right now. Everyone, please be careful out there. It's a big freakin' mess. Hey Canada-are you laughing at us Yankees panicking about the weather? We aren't seasoned veterans at dealing with the snow and ice like our friendly neighbors to the north.....

Ok, so don't love driving on ice

I like getting off work at 1:45pm....that is, as long as the reason isn't because we are having Giant Ice Storm 2006. Unfortunately, today, that was the reason we were sent home early. I was a little apprehensive as I have not yet had the opportunity to drive my new car in the snow and ice and, I wasn't too sure if I had an ice scraper or not (thanks to my co-worker Ann for hookin' me up with her extra one, because even if I did have one, I wouldn't have been able to get to it because my trunk was frozen shut....). So, it only took about 15 minutes to de-ice my car and get it in driveable condition. Then then fun began. My drive was uneventful until I was on Hwy 170. There I was, minding my own business, intently staring at the road ahead of me (and watching the crack in my windshield expand.....), when, out of nowhere, I see a Chrysler LeBaron heading STRAIGHT TOWARD ME. Not good, I thought to myself. Seems the LeBaron lost control, was swerving across 2-3 lanes of traffic, righted itself and headed IN THE WRONG DIRECTION. My options were limited at this point, since I could either 1. swerve and risk sliding into the median wall or 2. let him hit me. Luckily, neither of the two happened. I was able to get into another lane (the only one the LeBaron wasn't in) and made it safely past him. Not sure if the other drivers behind me were as lucky. After that-smooth sailing. I mean, sure, it took me over an hour to get home, but I am here now, safe and sound, the rest of the day ahead of me.................I think I'm gonna take a nap. All I hear is ice hitting my window. Haven't heard my obnoxious neighbor blow his nose yet, so maybe it'll be a good day after all.

Ewwww gross

Ewww....the creepy cafeteria guy at work asked me if I was single....followed by a really creepy laugh. I wasn't sure if he was talking to me or not as he has a lazy eye and I wasn't real sure who he was looking at..............I'm never going to the cafeteria again.

Happy Birthday Carrie!

Happy Birthday to my friend Carrie today, on the day of the Great Winter Storm, 2006......Hope you have a great, safe, day girl! I miss you-when is our big night out, complete with the East Side??? Tell Boogie to GET ON THAT!

I'm shocked

It's raining in St. Louis and I didn't see one Idiot Person on the way to work this morning! This is not the St. Louis I know and love. Where were the three car pile-ups? And the yahoo's going 70 mph in a work zone? Where were they? Everyone was on their best behavior. I just can't believe it. The local radio station was making fun of our supposed pending ice storm. They are calling it "You've Been Warned-Again, St. Louis", as the last time we were supposed to get snow, it didn't happen. Everyone is on high alert today. My boss is like "hey, if it starts icing-we are getting the hell outta here". Fine by me. We are supposed to be getting six inches of snow and ice, which, really, does not sound like much fun. I haven't driven my car in such weather yet, so it will be interesting to see how that goes.....wish me luck.

Everyone be careful out there if this storm does hit. Don't be an Idiot. I wouldn't want to have to publicly make fun of you on this blog.......

the world is full of crazy people

Ok, so I was at the gas station this morning (because, when your car is on "E", you really should put some more gas into it), minding my own business, when I hear this guy beeping at the pump. You know how the pump "beeps" when it is telling you to make your selection? Well, this dude was beeping back at it...I was a little frightened of him, to be quite honest. He was singing too, but that's a minor point. Then, there was another dude who walked by and burped really loudly, didn't care who heard him. Of course, this is the gas station that is at Jamieson and Hwy 44, so the chances of encountering someone crazy is pretty high. I just can't seem to escape them........

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DADDY!

Happy Birthday Dad! I hope you have a great day. I will try to call you tonight. Don't get too wild and crazy!

Luv,
Your baby girl

Scrooge

I just got an email from Ebenezer Scrooge informing me I was getting a lump of coal for Christmas. I don't think that's very nice. Just because I did some minor complaining about how the girls on our team were left out of the holiday planning committee plans and were demoted to "poster girls"........so rude.

I just can't believe Pamela Anderson is getting divorced!

Who would have thought that she and Kid Rock's marriage wouldn't last? Certainly not me...they struck me as quite stable. A love to last forever. First Britney and K-Fed, now this! What's next? Arnold and Maria? Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones? I just can't take it!

Are you picking up on any sarcasm, because I'm laying it on pretty thick.....

My hour and a half commute to work

Dude, what was up with the traffic this morning? And why in the hell was there a pedestrian on Hwy 40? No wonder the person got hit....I don't mean to be heartless, but they caused traffic to be at a standstill for SIX miles....not fun. So, I took an alternate route to get to Hwy 170 since 40 was totally not an option. I finally made it to 170 only to find that IT WAS BACKED UP TOO. It was at that time that I realized it was not in the cards for me to get to work on time. Good thing it's my late night.

Can I tell you that after I got home from the crisis line last night, I Swiffered the whole apartment? I was so excited about my Swiffer carpet-thingy that I just couldn't help but clean at 11:00pm. The thing is AWESOME! And it doesn't make noise, so I can "vacuum" whenever I want, not that I care about being noisy since my neighbor, Jo Jo The Clown doesn't seem to care about all the noise he makes.....could you blow your nose any louder dude? I mean seriously.......

things KD is loving right now.

1. The Swiffer Carpet Flick. LOVE IT! It scooped up all those mysterious hairballs (J and I were convinced there was a ghost in the apartment planting them...) and all the Christmas tree needles. It is a miracle product, and for only $15, a steal, if you ask me!

2. The new My Chemical Romance CD "Black Parade". You must listen to it. It is great with a capital G. Thanks to my little bro for introducing me to it and burning me a copy.

3. The new The Killers CD, "Sams' Town". A little different from their first CD, but still good. Plus the lead singer is hot. which never hurts album sales....

Any and every book written by Laurie Notaro. She is so freakin' funny. I'm talking laughing-out-loud-while-your-home-alone, wet your pants, laugh till you cry funny. And I am not exaggerating. Anyone with a sarcastic sense of humor will get it.

Try these products and let me know what you think!

I am so over this day

I really am. I mean, it's not like I was busy today, I'm just over it. I still have to work 5 hours at the crisis line tonight though. Not that I'm complaining about having a 13 hour work day, mind you. Besides, what would I do with myself just sitting at home? Probably just stare at the Christmas lights like I'm some kind of idiot savant or something. I work both jobs tomorrow too. I know I'm a glutton for punishment, but I just can't help it! Besides, the callers to the crisis line make me look a whole lot more normal (thank you random people for that!).

I think that's all I have to say for today. Shocking, I know. I don't think I've had enough stimulants today (caffeine, sugar). I'll try to come up with something interesting to talk about tomorrow, promise.

Scenes from the Davidson family Thanksgiving-2006

This is Hank eating the leftovers. Check out that gigantic plate-yep, he ate ALL of it.
You may be wondering what the hell this is. Well, dad buried the turkey carcas (years ago we found this hilarious) and placed rocks on it so the stupid dogs wouldn't dig it up, because who really wants a turkey carcas in their front yard?

Here's dad acting like he had something to do with making all this food. Don't be fooled-he didn't.
Little Miss Chloe. Sure, she looks innocent here, but don't let that cute little face fool you. She is a little biatch-she clearly does not like other female dogs, but DOES like Hank.....she and Stubby did not get along at all. It was kinda funny.

Happy Birthday Uncle Jimmy (aka Jimmy B!)

Happy Birthday to my Uncle Jimmy today. I think he's 31 or 32, something like that....anyway, uncle, hope you are having a great birthday!

I'm back in the STL after four days in Salem. It was a good visit, even if Stubby and I were fighting. That dog is a spoiled brat and she was giving me some attitude last night so I told her all about herself-then she kicked me. I am not happy with that little dog right now. And to think, I even fed her nacho chips while we were playing Yahtzee the other night....see if I help you out again, sista!

My newly made mixed CD's "Angry and Bitter" and "Not So Angry and Bitter" got me home tonight. That was all I listened to, and sang at the top of my lungs. I'm sure the other drivers were scared, and, really, they should have been.

I have spent the last two hours putting up my Christmas decorations. I really hate putting them up (it's hard work!) but now that it's almost done, it makes me really happy-so pretty! And, mom-I found some greenery to finish that wreath-it looks pretty good. Yes, people, I made my own wreath to hang on the front door and it looks pretty damn good, if I do say so myself. I rock. I had to take a decorating break because my back hurts. I'm an old, old woman.

Have you ever played Yahtzee with a Captain Morgan buzz?

If you haven't, I highly recommend it. Good times is all I have to say. We had our annual Thanksgiving Yahtzee tournament tonight and it didn't disappoint. I'm talking wet-your-pants laughing. In fact, I took down a few of the best quotes. Now, granted, if you weren't there, you may not find any of these very funny. But for those of us that were present, it was friggin' hilarious (friggin' is dad's favorite word).

So, here's the list:

1. "Go for your 1's"-by Dad. He's always trying to trick you so you lose. Never listen to him. Ever.

2. "My knee hurts"-by Tim. A completely random thought that just came out of his mouth. No one knows why.

3. "Your knee cap was not on the back of your leg"-by Mom. In response to Tim's melodramatic knee injury story.

4. "I heard a noise coming from Tim's room. Something like a "grrrrr"-by Dad. He came running into the living room in a panic after hearing said noise and was quite worked up about it. Turns out, it was my cell phone on vibrate that was making the "grrrr" noise.

5. "And those sweet little nugget things"-by Mom. I believe she was talking about Chex Mix.

6. "Sorry sucker"-by Aunt Paula to dad during a rather poor roll.

7. "Reykjavik is the capital of Iceland"-another random thought from Tim.

8. "One time, I got pulled over and the cop gave me six bucks"-again, random statement from Tim. It was the Captain talking.

9. "I think it's time to put my pain patch on"-by Mom. She's a narcotics addict, apparently.

10. "I hope the hemorrhoid pads didn't get recalled"-Dad's response to the news that several kinds of baby wipes were recalled recently.

And the funniest thing of the night was while we were playing a board game called Imagine If. Example question for the game "Imagine if Kerri was an animal, which one would she be?". There would then be a list of six animals and everyone playing votes. The most popular answer is the right one. Well, it was mom's turn to ask the question and dad was the subject. Mom couldn't even read the question, she was laughing so hard. So, she passed it to dad and he couldn't read it either. The question? What if Ken won the world's greatest contest. What would it be for?". The answer that made us all fall out of our chairs? "World's Largest Sausage". Guess you had to be there.

I think I'll sail with the Captain tomorrow night too.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLINT!!!!!

Happy Birthday to my baby cousin Clint! Hope you have a great day and are enjoying having your family out there with you in North Carolina!

Well, I finally made my first trip to the Salem Wal-Mart. Can you believe it? I've been here for three days and hadn't been there yet. It's a miracle. Nothing exciting happened while we were there, just announcing I went.

Other than that, I haven't done much while in Salem which is just fine with me. I've been able to sleep (although I was up at 6:30 this morning for some strange reason). I've been making CD's on Tim's computer. My greatest piece of work? A CD entitled "Angry and Bitter". I also made it's sister CD-"Not So Angry and Bitter". You're welcome to make copies if you want....

Now we are just waiting for Aunt Paula and Chelsea to get here. Mom has threatened to make us go back into town to go to all the craft stores. I think I'm gonna hide out-I'm ok missing that part.....I'm making my homemade chili for the fam on Sunday. It is pretty damn good, if I say so myself.

Well, that's all I have to say for now. More to come, I'm sure........

that Weird Little Dog

As soon as it came running towards us, I knew it would be a blog subject. After dinner tonight, my family decided to take a walk (to fend off that post-turkey bloat). The dogs, of course, went with us, so off we went down the road where Stubby proceeded to get in the pond. Hank was just so excited that his humans were outside, and, really, I don't think he knew what was going on anyway. As we walked, dad suggested we go see the house the new neighbor is building. That was when it happened. We walked past the other neighbors house and their Weird Little Dog started following us. It's this homely looking German Shepard, which, you may not know, scares the crap out of me (it involves a childhood memory of our German Shepard Susie tossing our kittens and the mama cat in the air until they were dead. When you are witnessing this at age five, it's pretty traumatic, believe me). For some reason this Weird Dog liked me and kept following me. I think she sensed fear. She also sensed that Chloe wanted to beat the living crap out of her. Hank just tried to hump her. Stubby was oblivious to the whole thing. So, as we turned to head back toward the house, I knew that Weird Dog was gonna follow us....and it did. Just hanging out, eating Stubby and Hank's food, not a care in the world. I wonder if it's still outside? It creeps me out, so I'm staying in the house.

Thanksgiving 2006

Hard to believe the end of another year is approaching. Wasn't it just 2005? Seriously. Well, 2006, thus far, has been an up and down year for me. I, of course, am thankful for all the good things that have happened, but I am also thankful for the bad. Sound weird? Well, the bad things that have happened have only made me stronger and they have reminded me of the good I have in my life.

I am so thankful for my friends. I never realized how many wonderful people were around me until I was in need of them. I seriously would not have made it through the last couple of months without them. You guys are my lifeline. I love you all.

I, of course, am thankful for my family. I never have to doubt how much they love me (and that includes the whole extended clan) and I hope they never doubt how much I love them. I am truly blessed to have the family I have. I promise to never take that for granted again.

I sucked this year. I wasn't a good friend, daughter or sister. I know it. I am owning it. And I'm never going to let it happen again. Promise. I think the Old Kerri is about 75-80% back, hopefully by the end of the year, I'll be 100% again.

To everyone out there-I hope you are with the ones you love this weekend. Go play football in the front yard, watch the stupid parades, eat yourself silly-its all part of the Thanksgiving fun. That, and the fact that you have a four day weekend.

Luv,
KD

"Watch out for the killer deer"

That is what dad always says before we head to Salem-especially at night. Well, heading home last night, I saw no killer deer but I did see a killer fox. Scared the crap out of me when I saw it's beady little eyes. The trip home was fairly uneventful. It took me three hours to get there (that's an hour extra than normal, if you're counting). I sat on Hwy 270 for 45 minutes (going a total of 14 miles). I had to deal with Crazy Old Lady on the highway-she was at least 107 years old and kept signaling to get into the middle lane-I let her over thinking "whatever lady, it's not like we're moving". Then, she would signal to get back in the outside lane. She did this three or four times. Weird. I did see a three car pile up on Hwy 44 involving a cattle trailer-that looked un-fun. And another accident right at the St. James exit. I am now in Salem safely. We have a house full of dogs-Chloe, Stubby and Hank-they have been having fun running around and Hank has been having fun humping Chloe. My most disturbing moment (so far) was my father talking about how good Jessica Simpson looks in her daisy duke's. You really never want to hear your dad talking like that-I'm sure he did it for shock value-and it worked. Red and I helped with the pies-Red was in charge of "fluting" this year and did quite a nice job (with the pie crust). I just stirred stuff, because, really, I shouldn't be allowed in the kitchen. Bad things happen. People get hurt. Usually me.

I've been up since 7:30am. Probably because I passed out somewhere around 10:00pm last night after Tim forced me to watch Harry Potter-wtf? I was confused from the beginning (go figure) and soon got sleepy (go figure). At least I got a good night's sleep for once.

I'm sure I will have some more blog worthy family moments coming up and be looking for my annual Thanksgiving message (get out the kleenex now)-coming soon. For now, I'm gonna watch a show about OCD on MTV. Later peeps.

RE: Toilet Talkers

Ok, most everyone agrees with me that it's weird to be talking on the phone while going to the bathroom. Especially in a public bathroom where other people can hear you and know what you're doing. It's sick and wrong and they must be stopped.

Things at work I am thankful for

-I am thankful for Sherill Sherake's mostaccioli (pronouced Sher-ril Sher-a-kee: not her real name but that's what we call her)
-I am thankful for Mike's daily show tunes and Justin Timberlake renditions.
-I am thankful my co-workers sang the Laverne and Shirley theme song with me.
-I am thankful that Amy agrees sitting on the floor eating cheese dip is an acceptable thing to do.
-I am thankful that Julie and I are the designated "poster girls", apparently a demotion in power as we wanted to be the holiday planners, but nonetheless, I'm still thankful. I'll bring the markers and glitter.
-I am thankful for the fact that for the first time in six years, I don't have to use PTO to have Thanksgiving and the day after off.
-Last but not least, I am thankful that none of my reviewers argued with me today, especially when I told them their patients didn't meet criteria.....must be the holiday spirit. Bah humbug.

Mama, I'm comin' home!

No, that was not an ode to Ozzy Osbourne, I really am coming home today. Yay! I look forward to getting there-I do NOT, however, look forward to sitting in the traffic on Hwy 44 this afternoon. Not fun at all.

Ok, today I have the Laverne and Shirley theme song in my head. I'm not sure thats a good thing. But, when I announced to my co-workers that I had that song in my head, they all began singing. Yea....it's gonna be a long day. We have enough food to feed 100 people, but Amy and I are baracading the cube the food is sitting in. We will not hesitate to bite or kick you if you try to take our food. Seriously. I suggested we just sit in the floor with a spoon and eat cheese dip all day. I still haven't ruled it out.....I ate a carrot stick and that just isn't working for me, so as soon as the pasta and cheese dip are hot, I am soooo over there. We told one co-worker that she ruined Thanksgiving (sounds like dad!) because she didn't bring us the gin and juice she said she would (when she offered to bring drinks for our food day, we jumped on the gin and juice bandwagon for some reason and began singing Snoop Dogg songs). My co-worker Jeff made everyone sign their initials next to what food/drink item they agreed to bring-so really she was contractually obligated to bring said gin and juice. Yet we have no gin and juice, but we do have some Diet Coke, so, really, all is right with the world.

Seriously, why?

I still have "Superfreak" in my head. Why, oh why? Please, someone make it stop.

Toilet Talkers and my random question for the day

1. What is up with the Toilet Talkers? I don't know if this happens in the men's restroom or not, but in the women's restroom, there are women that are actually talking on the phone while they are, you know...doing their business. What is up with that? Does anyone else find that weird?

2. Why do I have "Superfreak" in my head?

The Cubs are buying themselves a team!

It worked for the Mets, now the Cubbies are buying themselves a team. There's hope for 2008 yet! They landed Alfonso Soriano-I've heard of him so I'm guessing he's really good. It's making me excited for the baseball season even though it's quite a ways away. My friend Erin and I did decide we're doing Cubs spring training again in March. Anyone wanna go to Arizona with us? It's some good times, I promise!

So, I actually got some sleep last night, but still need some more. I don't really remember my drive to work this morning, I DO remember some a-hole riding my bumper on Hwy 70 when I was already going 75 (the speed limit is 60, I think), so, being the a-hole that I am, I slowed down ON PURPOSE. I know thats a good way to get your car hit and I'm sure it just increased his road rage, but it was the principle people. I was trying to make a point. He, of course, flipped me off when he passed me and I just smiled. Don't you love the holiday spirit? People crack me up.....

So, today at work I've already heard some singing of "Save A Horse Ride A Cowboy", which leads me to believe it's gonna be a long day. And we are now doing an impromtu food day tomorrow which can only mean one thing..........I'm breakin' out the big tub o' cookie dough tonight! No one can expect me to actually bake, but I can take already made cookie dough out of the freezer and throw it in the oven. If anyone wants to come over tonight and help me do 8 loads of laundry, bake and pack for a 4 day trip, let me know. I have no food or alcohol to entertain you with, but I'm sure it'll still be fun............

There's just something about that Wal-Mart

It wasn't just me. Did y'all hear about the dude that carjacked some people at the Maplewood Wal-Mart yesterday? That is the same Wal-Mart I was at on Saturday when I started having thoughts about harming others......now, I didn't act on my thoughts like this guy clearly did. It's called restraint people!

Three day work week

Don't you love three day work weeks? I know I do. I can't wait to go home Wednesday, but am totally not looking forward to sitting in that Hwy 44 traffic. That is gonna be way un-fun. At least while I'm home I'm gonna get to see my friend Robyn-it's been YEARS! I can't wait to see her and her little Lola.

Funny Stubby story (for those that know who Stubby is). I was talking with my mom yesterday and she says "guess what your puppy did". No telling with that little dog. My parents were leaving to go to Rolla, they drove past the pond and saw Stubby out on the island (their pond has a little island in the middle, so clearly she had to do some workin' to get there). No idea why she was on the island as there is nothing there, she was just hanging out. Poor Hank was on the bank just staring out at Stubby-we think he doesn't know how to swim (and we already know he's not that smart). I can't wait to see those dogs-especially when Chloe is coming down too-that should be real fun.....

I'm back at the crisis line again tonight-I just can't get enough, I tell ya!

back home

I'm back home, and I'm not talking about Salem. Back working at the crisis line and it seriously feels like I never left. I started taking calls as soon as I came in and haven't looked back! It's been good so far, already got to talk to some of my favorite frequents, it's good times. And, I'm not sitting at home by myself watching my 4 tv channels. I am definitely moving up in the world, huh?

I may finally be tired

I guess keeping really busy does finally take it's toll on you. I'm feelin' kinda sleepy today but have to be at the crisis line in two hours. Diet Coke will cure that, I'm sure.

Ended up having a fun Saturday night. Our Friends Thanksgiving was a hit. We even got to hear the ham story (don't ask). Afterwards, my friend Erin and I headed out, because, you know, we are single gals, we must go out and party, right? Uh yea....so we went to Big Daddy's...can I tell you how old I felt? Was anyone else over 25 besides us? No, we did have fun though. Little creeped out by the Old Bald Guy who kept calling us "baby" and asking us if we needed more drinks....I wanted to say, only one person has ever been allowed to call me baby and you sure as hell aren't gonna be the second...but I didn't, that would have been the beer talking. We did have a power girls shout out moment when "Since You Been Gone" came on. Funny how most of us could apply that song to our lives.....

I still managed to get up and go to church this morning (aren't you proud mom?). Grandpa talked the whole time and Red and I just giggled. Then we (and Jon) hung out with Grandpa for awhile at his house. Man can that guy tell some stories! We got to hear the haunted attic story from when they lived in New York, and the story of the guy who was renting their house in St. Louis and wasn't paying the rent-grandpa had to call him and when the guy said he wasn't living there anymore, grandpa says "I don't give a shit where you live, I want my money"(or something to that effect, the word "shit" was in there somewhere). Good times. Now I'm just killing time till I go to work. It'll be so fun to see my old peeps again!

I didn't mean to have homicidal ideation

It really was my own fault. I knew I shouldn't have done it. But, it kept calling my name, drawing me in. What was it, you may ask? Well I'll tell you-it was going to Wal-Mart on a Saturday afternoon. I should have known better. First there was nowhere to park-1st clue. Second, as I'm walking in, I see 20-30 other people walking in with me in a sort of trance-like state. It was kinda like we were in a cult....anyway, as soon as I walked in, mayhem. People everywhere. Screaming kids everywhere. Slow old ladies everywhere. The urge to harm others just crept up on me, I swear. Of course, when I actually started formulating plans in my head, I knew it was time to get out of there. So, I got my green bean casserole fixin's and face powder, and I got the hell out. There is no need to fill out any affidavits, I promise I won't harm anyone and I am able to contract for safety at this time.

just what I needed

I got an email from my friend Canada, who lives in, well....Canada today. It made me happy (it really is the little things in life...), now you are the subject of a blog entry Canada-aren't you excited? I can't wait to talk to you-call me soon (is it an international rate when you are calling Canada from the US and vice versa? I have no idea....). I'll think of you as I go to Salem next week and see the big Conoco, which is actually a BP now, but it's still the same idea....I miss you Canadian Bacon!

Luv, Yankee Doodle

P.S. My sign is Aquarius............

Words can't even describe

I can't even begin to explain the weirdness that was last night. Sarah and I both kinda felt like we were in the Twilight Zone. There were the weird group of doctors from Pfizer that were all completely wasted and quizzing us about smoking. Apparently one of the dudes we met is some big shot doctor from Connecticut who has invented some drug to help people stop smoking-it'll be available June 2007, FYI.....Anyway, then there was the doctors weird cousin (Cousin John, was it?), who explained to us (several times) that it is not necessary to wear cammo while deer hunting. Sarah was like "The folks at Bass Pro would be interested to hear that". Dude says all you need is your orange hat and vest. He also asked if Sarah and I were sisters....uh, yea. We tried to convince these drunk fools that we were heading to the east side to go to the strip clubs, but I don't think they bought it. And dude, what was up with that lady? Her bad 80's hair and shoulder pads mixed with her inability to carry on an interesting conversation totally explained why she's 37 and single...geez! People-if that's me at 37, take me out back with my daddy's shot gun and put me out of my misery, ok? What a freak (and not a good kind of freak, cuz I like the good kind of freak). So, we tried to ignore them and carry on our own conversation. The funniest part of the night-Sarah brought a gift certificate she had. I was like, great we can really do some drinking now! The gift certificate was from...........2002!!!! Hilarious...even better? They accepted it.
So, then we moved on to a bar that's close to my apartment. Nice little hole in the wall kinda place. We find a place to sit and not even five minute later some dude put a couple of Budweisers down on our table for us....we were like "uh, thanks?". Neither one of us drink Budweiser, but who is gonna say no to free beer? I was really hoping we weren't then gonna have to be forced to talk to him, which thank God were weren't until much later on. I am sure I am leaving some parts of the night out as right now it's a bit fuzzy-Sarah, feel free to fill in the details....

To all Diet Coke addicts-Schnucks has 12 packs on sale three for $7.88. It's a steal!!!! I rushed right over to my neighborhood Schnucks before they were all gone (and the shelves were already nearly empty!). Go now!!!!

TGIF, Part 27

Really, isn't it TGIF every Friday? Fridays actually aren't so much fun at my job because it is the busiest day of the week. I, however, being the butt kissing over-achiever that I am, managed to finish all 14 of my cases by 2:30. Yes, it's true-I rock. Then (in patented Kerri butt kissing fashion), I helped my co-workers finish their cases. Dude, really it was cuz I was bored, but don't tell anyone. Now, just waitin for it to be time to go. Going to happy hour tonight and, really, that is what has gotten me through the day thus far. One of my hospital contacts in Kansas City told me that it's good to have goals and forward thinking (happy hour). I agreed, and promised him I'd have a margarita for him. I am such a giver!

Book club was so much fun last night. We just laughed, and laughed and laughed. And Christina-I'm really not mad at you for your inability to filter-it's ok! Can't wait for next month and our White Elephant gift-I have a montage of things to choose from for that. Someone is gonna be a very, very lucky girl!

I am definitely looking forward to this weekend. I will be very busy, but that's the way I like it! Lots of fun plans and then back to the crisis line on Sunday to begin my second job! I know, I'm crazy (guess I'll fit in well, huh?). Then we have the three day work week next week and then TIME OFF. I so cannot wait for that. And I'm excited about going home.

Have a good weekend everyone. Be safe and all that good stuff. Watch out for the other guy (as my dad likes to say)

I'm bored

Seriously bored. Still at work. Been done with my cases since like 2:45. Got nuttin' to do. I know, there are worse problems to have.....half my co-workers are gone so there is no one to bug, I still have 45 minutes before I can leave....what is a girl to do? At least I have book club tonight-that will be fun. But what will I do between now and 6pm? Guess I'll have to come up with something.......

Happy Birthday Deven!

Happy birthday today to my old friend Deven. OMG-is Deven the big 3-0 today? Why, I do believe he is a fellow 76'er. Welcome to the Dirty Thirty club Dev! It's such a great club to be in, let me tell ya! We've been friends since our CMSU days. Hey CMSU readers-remember when, for a time, he went by "D-Mac"? That was really funny....good ol' Deven-I miss him! He, my friend Christi and I had some good times together. Usually it was spent drunk at a rugby party, but whatever-we sure had fun. And remember the time in the dorms when Deven and Todd had a pony keg in their bathtub? Such good times!

we're under attack!

Dude-I was bombarded by Old Newsboys Day people this morning on my way to work (there were like 600 of them on Jamieson.....). I felt guilty avoiding eye contact with them (especially since my Grandpa is one of those people this morning), but seriously, I have no money to give to the cause (what is the cause anyway?). I did feel for the poor guy whose pile of papers started blowing all over the street from the wind, and the other guy who dropped his money and it was flying down Jamieson. I didn't feel bad enough to help, mind you, I had to get to work people! I will have to find some other way to give back, I promise I will........isn't my presence in the world gift enough???????? Yep, I got a little bit of sleep last night so the sarcasm is ON today people. You've been warned. I've already threatened to scrap with a couple of my co-workers, everyone is placing bets-some have their money on me-I am awful scrappy when I want to be......my friend Amy said she's getting shin guards (I do like to kick.....). Oh yea, it's gonna be a good day!

Dude from Missouri ROCKS!

Anyone watching The Biggest Loser? Well, the Missouri guy got voted off tonight (he was up against the stupid Florida guy-whatever!). Anyway, they give you an update at the end of the show telling how much they've lost since they've been off the show. Missouri dude has lost 140 freakin' pounds. Good Lord-that's more than I weigh! I thought it was pretty cool. I'll have you know it's been two whole weeks since that show made me cry....see, I'm 'a gettin' tough (or just angry and bitter, whatever.....)

I will NOT tolerate it snowing tonight. Not one little bit. Do you hear me?

Has anyone ever been sooooo tired that they get completely irrational and have a bit of a breakdown? That was me last night. Beginning my third night in a row of virtually not sleeping at all, I snapped around 12:30am last night. Spontaneously bursted out crying (which is a really sad state of affairs as you are crying and talking to yourself and you're the only one there....). I was just so frustrated that I couldn't fall asleep. The weird part? My entire body was asleep except for my head. My head won't stop. And its not one particular thing I'm thinking about, oh no, it's a good mix of crap that need not be in my head at 12:30 at night. I'm pretty sure the makers of Lunesta will NOT be hiring me to do their commercials as I think their product is a BUNCH OF CRAP......

Despite my sleepless night and the crappy weather today, I did have a good day. Sure, it took me over an hour to get home from work, but it was still a good day. I did a conference call with one of the hospitals I work with and was happy to hear that they love working with me (especially good to hear when your supervisor is in the room). So, that was pretty cool. I jokingly call myself The Evil Managed Care Lady. See, if you just make 'em laugh, they will be like putty in your hands...(just kidding). I'd call in sick tomorrow, but I don't want Amy to kill me (half our team will be in Pennsylvania) leaving the rest of us to pick up the slack.

Oh, and Broker-let me talk to Mike tomorrow to discuss happy hour plans-I will keep you updated!

Be safe out there tonight people in the S-N-O-W.

Happy Birthday Aunt Diane!

Happy Birthday to my Aunt Diane (also known as Uncle Jimmy's better half-ha! Just kidding Unc!). I hope you have a wonderful birthday. Why is it that all my relatives were born in November? We still have Uncle Jimmy, Clint and my daddy left this month! Geez people! :)

And starring.................Sarah B!!!!!!!

How cute is she? This is my friend Val's little girl, Sarah. These are her 2-year-old pictures. This kid is a trip. Not too long ago, I got to talk to her on the phone. That was some good times. She is a very funny kid. Must get it from her mama....(not that BB isn't funny!).

big, exciting news

My friend Jill called to inform me today that the one, the only BRET MICHAELS is performing at the Stratford friday night. You know him as the lead singer of Poison...80's hair metal bands at it's best....I doubt I will be in attendance, because seriously, I don't think I can handle hearing "Every Rose Has It's Thorn". It's a personal choice every girl has to make for herself. However, if I have too much fun at happy hour after work, I may be persuaded to hang out in Fenton..........