Monday, February 28, 2011

Tornadoquakes, oh my!

Mother Nature was being a b**ch last night. I mean, was in necessary to send not one but TWO natural disasters last night? I mean, seriously lady!

So, around 11pm last night the tornado siren started going off. What's more concerning is that I refused to get out of bed....until The Voice started talking. Yes, the City of St. Louis' tornado siren talks. It's this male monotone voice that says "this is a tornado warning, please seek shelter immediately". Instead of seeking shelter immediately, I went over to the big picture window to look outside and see if I could see Dorothy and/or Toto. I did not. I then went back to bed. I mean, nothing to see right? That's when I swore I felt my bed move. It was later confirmed there was an earthquake right around that time in Northern Arkansas. WTH man?
When the sirens started getting louder and the rain was blowing sideways, I decided it might be a good idea to go ahead and go down to the basement. One of my neighbors joined me. First time ever meeting him. It was a bit awkward, both of us in our jammies, in the basement, on a Sunday night. That, and he barely spoke English, but whatevs. We stayed down there until the rain stopped.

After all that fun, I was WAY too keyed up to sleep. Good thing I was off work today (waiting for the cable guy). I didn't fall asleep until 2-ish.

Next time Mother Nature comes to visit, I'd like to politely request only one natural disaster at a time. K? Thanks.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Headin' to Wrigley, y'all!

I was one of those psycho Cubs fans waiting in the virtual waiting room today, the first day single game tickets went on sale. I only had to wait 20 minutes before I was given the privilege of ordering overpriced tickets for what I'm sure is gonna be an underachieving team...but I digress. I'm going with a large group of folks, but everyone was on their own to get tickets....we are going to one of the premium games against the Phillies (my 2nd favorite NL team!), so I wanted to make sure to get my tickets. Granted, I probably could have waited until later in the summer and gotten some off Stubhub for cheaper, but I didn't want to take the chance. And, besides, it's probably gonna be my only trip to Wrigley this summer, so I justified my overspending. Let's just say bleacher tickets for a premium game are RIDICULOUSLY overpriced. But it'll be worth it to be with fellow Cubs fans. My people. I don't really have any Cubs people here in St. Louis, so I'm very much looking forward to it! That, and I can ogle Chase Utley in person. Mama like.

BASEBALL!!!!

TCB

Kids, I'm TCB'in over here.

Ok, so for the last few months (since April 2010, really), I have been incredibly stressed at my job. Both jobs. Y'all know I work in mental health. And with the state of the world, the economy, etc, there's a lot of crazy folks out there. A LOT. Meaning, my job has been quite, quite busy with no let up in sight. You also know I work two jobs. Well, friends, KD is BURNT OUT. Done. But I can't really afford to quit my part-time job quite yet, so I was in a quandry. What to do? Not much is gonna change at my full time job, I just have to suck it up buttercup. BUT, perhaps I could do something about my part time job. I put my big girl pants on yesterday and asked to speak to my supervisor. I told her all of the above and also stated that I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to quit,  but that I needed a break. Granted, I'm only there 4 hours a week, but coupled with about 50 at my full timer, it's a lot. And I'm tired. And old. And cranky. She told me she'd talk to the director and get back to me.

Well, she said because I've been there for 10+ freakin years, I'm a bit "special" (I asked if she meant special in the head....she said no), and that they would be willing to work something out because they don't want me to quit. So.......effective next week, I am only going to work every other Thursday. Yep, a whopping 8 hours a month. It won't be all that profitable, BUT, it may save my sanity. If it means eating ramen noodles for a while then I'm fine with that.  We are going to revisit the arrangement in April and see where I'm at them. I'm incredibly grateful for their willingness to work with me on this. I guess sticking it out for a freakin decade was worth something.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Ice? What ice?

So, apparently the roads iced up overnight. Who knew? Apparently no one, cuz there were roughly 2,000 accidents on St.Louis roads this morning. Give or take a few. Including a 23 car pile up on EB Hwy 40. Yikes. I heard on the radio that my usual route was closed on both sides of the highway (never good), so I took an alternate route to work today. As I was sitting in traffic there as well, totally rocking out to a Goo Goo Dolls song that was on the radio (don't judge, you know you would have been singing it too), I hear someone honking. I looked up and who do I see in the lane next to me but my sister and my niece! How funny is that??? My sis said that after they got off on their exit, Kendall was asking for me, my sister told her that Aunt Kerri had to go to work and my little munchkin said "Kewwi no work no". HOW CUTE IS THAT?????? Seriously.Love.That.Kid.

And I'd much rather hang out with my niece than be at my place of employment. Especially this week. Monday was a typically busy Monday, no surprises there, but yesterday? Yesterday was as busy as Monday with the added bonus of everything going wrong. So much so that at one point, I literally burst into tears. For reals. Stress and hormones do not mix, my friends. I didn't get home until 7pm (after leaving work I then got stuck in hockey game traffic...and the Blues didn't even have the courtesy to win. Rude). Today? Well, I was hoping for a better day...but then I got to work and found out our voicemail system was down. Let me tell you why that's a big deal-WE DO ALL OF OUR WORK VIA VOICEMAIL. This did not bode well for the rest of the day. The good news is, it was up and running again around 11:30 or so, so we only lost half a day of productivity.....yes, I say "only" sarcastically. I'm just about caught up, so I'm hoping the next three hours go by uneventfully. Oh, and for those that follow me on Facebook...I got my hot pink bat back. :)

Let's talk baseball. This Cubs fan is truly saddened to hear that the Cardinals Adam Wainwright may have to have TJ surgery and miss the 2011 season. I don't like to hear about anyone getting hurt. And I imagine if the Cubs actually had an Ace, it would suck to lose him. I'm already reading on various web sites and blogs that people are excited about this and feel this ups their teams chances of winning the division. True, it's a huge blow to the Cardinals, but I would never celebrate the loss of a player due to a season ending injury. That's not cool. And besides, Wainwright or not,  the Cubs will still end up in 3rd or 4th place, so..........

Monday, February 21, 2011

Adult truths (an email forward that's actually funny)

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

18. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

19. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

20. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

Your Cubs opening day starter.........

The Cubs have named Ryan Dempster as their Opening Day starter for the 2011 season, ending Carlos Zambrano's Reign of Terror and proving, yet again, that Canada is trying to take over the world.

Hangin with my favorite girl

I took Kendall to the park on Saturday while mommy and daddy went house hunting. She was shy at first and didn't want to go play with the other kids there....but that didn't last long. She was all over the slides and, of course, made Aunt Kewwwi slide with her, thus why I'm black and blue today. Nothing cute about a 35 year old sliding down a slide and climbing through tunnels meant for the 2-5 year old set. Just sayin.
After park time, we went home where we watched Yo Gabba Gabba and learned on there how to be nice to everyone (great message, right?). We also learned that one of the characters has a BFF that's a talking balloon. Um.....
When K's mom and dad returned, we had pizza and watched the Blues stellar 9-3 win over the Ducks. K wasn't real excited about watching the game, in fact, during dinner she kept saying "no Blues, Blues no". Ha!  But you'd best believe when mom and dad and auntie started yelling and cheering, little miss wanted in on the action, even doing the power play dance with us. Fun times. :)
My sis said she woke up yesterday morning asking for "Kewwwi". Is that not the greatest thing EVER?????

Friday, February 18, 2011

Who takes the calls at the crisis line when the building has been evacuated?

The answer would be........no one. Yea, so right around 5pm last night, the fire alarm went off at the crisis line (5pm being one of the busiest times) and the building had to be evacuated. I had to hang up on my caller (sorry bout that). They have a plan in place with these cordless phones that supposedly can connect to our call queue so we can keep taking calls even as the building is aflame. These cordless phones have not worked the entire 10 years I've worked there. Just sayin.

Because I'm an a-hole, I took a picture of the fire truck (of course I did!). I'm sad to report that none of the firefighters were hot (believe you me, I looked), but one was carrying a big stick and the other had a ladder that was pretty cool. I wanted to re-enter the building via the ladder but apparently that's frowned upon. Anyhoo....the building was not actually on fire (even as second fire truck showed up...really?), I have no idea what actually happened, but we were outside in the 70 degree weather for a good half hour. SWEET. I swear I didn't pull the fire alarm.......

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Old age sucks

People, I tossed and turned all night last night thanks to some annoying lower back pain. And this morning? Well, I can't look down without it triggering pain on my lower left back. Awesome. WTH? I even stretched before hitting the treadmill yesterday. I did what I was supposed to do. My only conclusion is that this must be chalked up to old age. And I want to kick it in the face. It started last week when I was sick ON MY BIRTHDAY. I mean, what better way to say "hey, you're middle aged now, congrats". And now the back pain. I'm waiting for the wrinkles to take over-I don't really have any yet, but with the way things are going, it's inevitable I'd say.

Luckily, I still had one Skelaxin left from the time I had a stiff neck, so I took it this morning and while it is helping the pain a bit, it is also making me nauseated and drowsy. Um...I'm at work, so that strikes me as not good. Oh well, perhaps it will also numb the pain that is this week. Every day has sucked ass. Today is no exception.

I need to go walk around. Later.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Exciting news (watch me make this all about me...)

Given the most excellent job I've done in my role of Auntie, God has seen it fit for me to do it again. Yes, folks, MY SIS IS PREGNANT! Woot woot! We are so excited about 2.0! The job of Auntie has BY FAR been my most favoritest job EVER and I must say, I am pretty damn good at it. Of course, it helps that miss K is so freakin awesome, she makes being an awesome Auntie pretty easy. We're not sure how K feels about being a big sister, but she does like to show you IN PUBLIC, where mommy's baby is. K will be about 2 and a half when the baby is born-just about the same age difference between me and my sister. It's still too early to know the gender of the baby (my sis is 13.5 weeks currently, baby is due August 22), but my gut tells me it's a boy. I don't know why, but that's what I'm going with. Either way, I'm excited. And terrified (back to making it about me). Babysitting K is pretty easy for the most part, she does what you tell her to do (most of the time), takes a bath like she's supposed to and goes to bed when she's supposed to. It's a pretty easy gig. But the thought of Aunt Kewwwi (as K calls me) watching TWO little munchkins? Well, it's daunting at best. We all know what a spaz I am. I will say that this pregnancy excites me because my sis is actually here in St. Louis this time. We can be around her during the pregnancy and will get to be around when the baby is born-something we didn't get to do with K because they were in Texas then-so that makes me happy.

I will vent for one second. Nothing irritates me more than when people say "if you love your niece so much maybe you should have a baby of your own". Actually that statement makes me angry. Just  because I love my niece more than life itself doesn't mean that I need to be a parent. Those that make those blanket statements may mean well, but they need to think before they speak. Has it ever occurred to anyone that maybe I don't want children? That my life is plenty full without "having a child of my own". And hello folks, I'm 35 and single. And I work two jobs. Does having a baby really sound like a feasable option at this current moment in time? I hate that getting married and having childen is what defines you. I am so much more than that. I wish people would believe me when I say that I'm happy with my life the way it is. Would I like to get married? Sure, if that's part of the plan God has for me. Would I like to have kids? Again, sure, IF that's part of my life's plan. I'm not so sure it is. And I have to be ok with that. I'm grateful for what I have. And besides, I'm wayyyyyyy set in my ways at this point. And I'm a giant pain in the ass. ;)

So, when I say that I love being an aunt, trust that I LOVE BEING AN AUNT. K is the greatest kid in the world and I have no doubt that 2.0 will be as well. I love nothing more than spending time with K and jump at every opportunity to babysit her or spend time with her (like this Saturday!). I love that perhaps I will help shape the person K will become. I hope that she and I will always be close like I am with my aunts. I can't wait to bond with 2.0 and am so excited about his/her pending arrival!

Monday, February 14, 2011

Happy Valentines Day!

I got to spend the weekend with all the people I love most, did you?

Friday night we went to the Blues game. Thanks to my friend Allison for pooping out on us, we ended up with an extra ticket....so my brother-in-law and niece got to go with us! Yay! It was Kendall's first hockey game, and I'm pretty sure she loved it. She was so cute in her Blues jersey yelling "Go Blues!" and doing the power play dance with us (I can't really describe the dance, you'd just have to see it). She was high-fiving the guy in front of us every time the Blues scored. Alas, they ended up losing in a nine round shootout, but it was still so much fun!

Saturday, my sis, bro-in-law, nieces (Kendall and the furry niece Chloe), and I headed down to Salem to see the fam. No one makes me laugh harder than these people. There were times at dinner when we were all laughing so hard we were crying. LOVE IT! Kendall, of course, entertained us, especially when trying to say my name, my brother's name and Grandma. I can't even put into type how she says "grandma". As for Aunt Kerri, we think she has settled on something that sounds like "Kelly". And for my brother, we think she was calling him Todd, which is funny since his name is Tim. :)  At one point, we swear she called me "Kitty" and called Tim "Donald", which of course made us laugh the entire weekend. Everytime Tim talked we were like "whatever, Donald". Ok, guess you had to be there. ;) Kendall helped my mom and I make my birthday cupcakes-they turned out pretty good!

Yesterday after dinner we headed back to the STL....maybe leaving right after dinner wasn't the best idea because yours truly got carsick. Like for reals. I was praying to God, Jesus, Tom Cruise, ANYONE to not throw up in the car. I was devising in my head a plan in the event that I was not able to hold it. Luckily, I was able to until we hit the next town and I was able to take care of business at some skanky small town gas station. UGH. There is a big difference between feeling a bit nauseated and knowing you're about to hurl. You're welcome for the visual.

My niece broke my heart as I left their house to go to my own last night. First I hear her upstairs yelling "Kelly!", so I went up to say bye to her and she says "no bye bye" and pointed to my shoes and said "boot off" (if shoes are off, that means you're staying). Then, THEN, she tried to take my keys from me! Kid was serious. I love that she wants her Aunt "Kelly" around though. We're good buddies. Is it sad for my best friend to be a 22 month old? She's pretty much the coolest person I've ever met.

Today is Valentines Day. While I don't have a "valentine" per se, I do have a lot of people that I love and that I'm pretty sure love me. So....Happy Valentines Day, everyone!

Oh and the best-PITCHERS AND CATCHERS HAVE REPORTED. I repeat-PITCHERS AND CATCHERS HAVE REPORTED. Yay! Baseball is coming!!!!! I don't even care if my team is gonna yet again be mediocre (at best), I just so excited for my favorite sport to start. Oh, and looks like Albert Pujols is gonna hit the free agent waters. People in STL are freaking the hell out, and rightly so. I know a lot of my fellow Cubs fans are drooling over the prospect of AP wearing blue pinstripes next season. I, oddly enough, am not one of them. Would it be awesome to have the greatest baseball player that ever played the game be on my team? Of course. But here's the deal-Albert Pujols is a Cardinal. He should remain a Cardinal. That's just the way it is. So to Cards management-just get it the F done already. Thanks.

Friday, February 11, 2011

Colds, hockey and family

I think I might be turning a corner with this cold. Still can't breathe but I'm less achy and actually slept a full nine hours last night, which I think helped. Good thing, cuz I got a lot going on this weekend.

Tonight me, my sis and some of my girls are going to the Blues game----YAY! I hope to see a good game, they're playing the Wild, so we shall see. Tomorrow, I'm heading to Salem with my sis, bro-in-law and niece to celebrate my birthday with my family. Kendall has apparently been talking about going to "pawpaw's house", how cute is that???? I haven't been home since before Christmas, so it will be nice to relax and chill with the fam for a couple of days.

Hope everyone has a great weekend! It's supposed to be in the 50's here this weekend...thank Bejebus. I'm so sick of the ice. MELT ALREADY!

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

Happy Birthday to me!

Best.Birthday.Ever.


OMG. My friend Robin truly loves me!


Happy birthday to me!!!!! Two great things have happened thus far today-one, I arrived at work to find a pinata hanging outside my cubicle. WITH A BAT. Sweet ass sweet. And it's stuffed with Jolly Ranchers. Thanks Rob, you are the BESTEST!!!!!!!!!!! The other is that my supervisor for reals believed me when I told her I was 29 today! LMAO! Now she's mad at me for lying to her, but whatever.

Truth is folks, I'm 35 today. How the F did that happen? I swear to Baby Jesus that I skipped a couple of years or something. No idea how this occurred. However, I'm not wallowing in self pity about it. I'm happy, healthy, and have some of the greatest friends a girl could ask for. I also have the most amazing family.....I've got no complaints. Except for the cold I have.

Yes, I tried to pretend that the non-stop sneezing on Monday was nothing-I'd been around a cat on Sunday, surely that was it. Um.....no. By yesterday afternoon, I was still sneezing and so congested I could barely hold my head up. I got home around 6:30pm, and proceeded to have cherry NyQuil for dinner. I hurridly took a shower, ate dinner and did some laundry before it kicked in. I slept for a couple of hours but woke up feeling as if someone had punched me in the face-total sinus pressure. I stumbled around looking for some Advil. Hot mess. That's me.

So, today, despite my NyQuil hangover, I'm determined to have a good day. I'm having dinner with two of my favorite girls tonight-my sis and munchkin niece, we're going to the Blues game on Friday for my birthday and then on Saturday my sis, bro-in-law, niece and I are driving to Salem to see my parents and brother and to celebrate my birthday with them. Sounds perfect.

I'll post pics later after I beat the shit out of that pinata! HOLLA!

Tuesday, February 08, 2011

My niece is 22 months old today!

I can't believe my favorite little munchkin is almost two! It is super crazy how fast time flies! EXCITING NEWS-she finally said my name on Sunday! Or close enough. Before when you said "Kendall, can you say Kerri?" she'd look at me and say "yea". Well, on Sunday she called me "Kee" and my sister swears she heard "Kelly" at one point. YAYYYYYYY! I'm not gonna lie, it totally made my day, week, month, year. Best birthday present I could ever get. Seriously.

The rapid growth in her speech in just the last 2-3 weeks is amazing-she is regularly saying 2 word sentences and having whole conversations in Kendall-ese (it's hilarious, we have no idea what she's saying, but it sure is funny to listen to her!). She still loves the word "no" (ha! What toddler doesn't?). She's so darn cute...and that's what's gonna save her when the Terrible Two's set in. ;)

Thursday, February 03, 2011

GO PACKERS!

Today, in the spirit of the Super Bowl, we are having a cubicle decorating contest at work. Clearly, I should win.

Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Pitchers and catchers report THIS MONTH!

That's really all I got. Get excited people! Baseball is right around the corner! WOO HOO!

This kid cracks me up!!!!

Nothing to see here, just reading the sports page........

Snowmageddon? More like LAME-ageddon

So, apparently the entire country other than ST LOUIS  CITY AND COUNTY is getting hit with blizzard conditions. Oh, don't worry, it was predicted to come here too......and then it didn't. Most everyone stayed home yesterday in anticipation of the BIGGEST STORM IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. And it never happened. By early evening weather reports were saying St. Louis would get 2-4 inches of snow, when, just hours before we were still hearing 20+ inches. Um....there is a half inch of snow and a couple inches of ice in my yard. I CAN STILL SEE THE GRASS. People working from home today? LAME (unless you live in East Jesus. If you do, you may actually have some snow and for that you will be forgiven). The roads are better today than they were two weeks ago when it snowed 10+ inches. Yes, I'm grateful for the day off yesterday. And yes, I'm grateful that we don't have 20 inches of snow to wade through like the rest of the state. But I'm also irritated. Irritated that the media hyped this up and freaked people the hell out and then.....nothing. I mean, it's one thing to be off by a few inches, but to get NOTHING when they'd predicted a frickin blizzard is just laughable to me. And I will never believe the hype again. I'll believe it when I see it.

Now, a place that really DID get hit with a blizzard is Wisconsin-my territory. And guess what? I just spoke to someone in Milwaukee LIVE. He's at work. And they for real have 20 inches of snow. He was like "um, I'm from Minnesota, this is nothing". Right. For those in Chicago-I know you got slammed, please be safe and don't leave home if you don't have to. For those in the rest of the parts of Missouri-the same thing. Stay home.

So, I'm at work. Not trying to be a hero or anything, I mean, I have no reason to not be at work. It's business as usual. So why are there only like 5 people here? WTH man?

Oh yes, Snowmageddon didn't even happen, yet it's still making me cranky. At least the groundhog didn't see his shadow today. I think that means that spring starts tomorrow. Or something.