Do you remember? Don't lie! You know you do....

I remember watching Duck Tales after school. And yes, I can still sing the theme song...duck tales, woo hoo!

I remember this kid named Joe made a pair of Hammer pants in our 9th grade Home Ec class...they were HOT!

I LOVED The Babysitters Club! My sister and I literally had all the books (like 60 or 70 of them!)

Remember when Michael Jackson was still black? I had a huge poster of him over my bed (it's true!). Red and I used to listen to "Thriller" with the lights out and scared ourselves silly!

You know you had a stone washed jean jacket! I put New Kids On The Block pins all over mine!

And you know you wore flourescent! I remember this was about 7th or 8th grade for me. I know I had a pair of hot pink biker shorts....sexy, huh?

I loved this game! In fact, I played it with Jesse's daughters not all that long ago!

Now, the Ninja Turtles were more my brothers thing-he had all four of them-you know-the like 18 inch tall ones? And, yes I can name them all-Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello and Rafael!

Remember "I've fallen and I can't get up?"Classic.

Oh, the jelly shoes. I know I had some, don't remember what colors, though.

I remember making these friendship bracelets. They were really hard to make!

I LOVED He-Man! Watched it every day after school. If you play your cards right, I may even do the theme song for you...yes, I still remember it. Here's a sample "Only three others share this secret. Our friends The Sorceress, Man-At-Arms and Orco. Together, we defend the secrets of Castle GraySkull from the evil forces of Skeletor!". Sad, I know. I also remember playing He-Man with our cousins Matt and Chris on their farm in Illinois. We always made Red be the stupid girl, She-Ra, I wanted to be one of the cool boy characters! And who knew that He-Man would become a gay icon?

Oh, Hypercolor shirts. Who the hell thought that was a good idea?

What can I say about New Kids On The Block. I was in love with (and going to marry) Jordan. Red and I had our bedroom walls plastered with their pictures.We saw them twice-once at Six Flags and once at the old Arena. I thought I'd love them forever....

If a Saved By The Bell re-run was on right now, I'd watch it.

Did anyone have their birthday party at McDonalds? I don't think I ever did. Mom, didn't Tim have one there? Or am I making that up?

I totally had a Rainbow Brite doll. It was the coolest thing ever!

Remember tight rolling your jeans? I remember thinking there is no way I will every NOT tight roll my jeans.....

Oh, we had a slip and slide. Many summers of fun with that one....

You know you used to put your hair up in a banana clip!

Big hair. I had it in high school. Some people still have it....

Mullets. I am traumatized by my 4th grade mullet (and, no, you cannot see a picture of it). My mom says it was all the rage and I really wanted that cut. Horrifying.

Shot through the heart, and you're to blame! You give love a bad name. Enough said.

Wasn't that time fun? What other 80's/90's stuff do you remember?

Please don't touch my private parts

OMG, I swear I have never laughed harder in my life than I did tonight during my dinner with Renee and Heidi. Wow. My sides still hurt. You know most things are only funny if you were actually there. When you re-tell it, it just doesn't have the same "umph" that it did when it happened. That being said, let me tell ya all about it:

We met at our favorite neighborhood place, Biggie's, and quickly placed our orders-including the infamous waffle fries. I ordered first and told the waitress I wanted the chicken and broccoli, to which Renee replied "chicken and broccoli, what's that?". To which I replied, "uh....it's chicken.... and broccoli". We then cracked up and she called me a smart ass (go figure!). Later, a group of people walked past us to get to their table (the place is kinda small and all the tables are pretty close together), as they did, Renee "accidentally" elbowed the guy in his, um, area. She then says "I think I just elbowed him in his package". Again, mass laughter. After we calmed ourselves down from that one, we talked about normal stuff, you know, like what Heidi is going to name her baby (she won't tell us) and about her husband John being attacked by drug dealers (true story, he's ok, I'll leave it at that). Heidi then gets up to go to the bathroom (as a pregnant woman who just drank like 10 glasses of iced tea will do) and says to Renee before she leaves "please don't touch my privates". Yep you guessed it, again, mass laughter. I love it. Those girls are some good times.

Oh yea, I totally forgot to tell y'all about how I totally busted my ass yesterday in the parking lot at work. Yep, down on the ice I went. Landed on my left side, thought "ok, my pants are a little wet, but I'm fine", no biggie, right? When I got to the crisis line, my friend Tanya goes "why do you have dirt all over your pants?". Uh yea.....and today? A massive bruise on my upper leg and my knee. Oddly enough, they don't hurt. You see, when you injure yourself as often as I do (and not on purpose), you tend to not feel the pain any longer. Frightening, I know.

Well, I know it's friday night and I should be out "partying", or something, but I just don't have it in me tonight. I'm old, DAMMIT! I'm actually quite exhausted and the only thing I can focus on is reading my magazine then going to bed and sleeping as late as I want tomorrow. It really is the little things in life that can make you happy.......I lead an exciting life, don't I? Admit it, you're jealous.

waffle fries

I think it's actually gonna happen. Barring any acts of God, I think Heidi, Renee and I are finally gonna get our Biggie's night in! Yay! You know what that means.........WAFFLE FRIES!!! We're bringing our own potatoes, right Heidi? I soooo cannot wait. I have been eating good all week so that I can splurge on the waffle fries....is it 6:30 yet?

Heidi, protect the fetus, because I think I may be coming down with some sort of illness. Of course, most of the time, I never get a full blown cold or flu, no, I just have this underlying feeling like crap NOS (not otherwise specified). Well, my doctor always says that if what comes out of your nose is some strange color (yellow, green, hell even purple), then you probably have some sort of infection. I'll spare you the details, but suffice to say, I think this may be the case for me. It will not stop me from having fun this weekend, however. I totally cannot wait to hang with my girls tonight and tomorrow the Book Club girls and I are going to be painting pottery-fun, huh? It actually really is-I love it.

Who is your Super Bowl pick? I'm gonna go with....................I don't give a crap who wins, I ain't gonna lie. I didn't even know who was in it until last week. Who has the prettier uniform? I'll gowith them......

Pregnant people are so funny

My dear friend Heidi is so freakin' funny. She is expecting her first baby in May and let me tell you, being around her during her pregnancy is hilarious. From her random food cravings (waffle fries, anyone?) to her need to urinate every 15-20 minutes, there is never a dull moment.

Tonight, Heidi informed me that her belly button was, and I quote, "coming to the surface". I felt bad laughing out loud because she was very, very serious. She relates this story to me about how she noticed that the area around her belly button was dryer that the rest of her belly. So, to combat this, she used about a half bottle of cocoa butter lotion and noticed that her belly button was changing. Which, if your belly is growing, it's bound to happen. She is now freaked out and obsessed about this. And I just sit and laugh at her.

What else are friends for? By the way, the picture is NOT of Heidi.

Mom, sorry for the language.....

I thought this was pretty damn funny. Thanks Karen for a good laugh today, I have forwarded it on.....

YES!

People, today, for the first time, I was able to listen to the song "Jesse's Girl" without having some sort of negative reaction (usually turning the station very quickly, or skipping it on my iPod, or yelling "I hate that f***ing song, or in one case, having my friend Erin run across the room yelling "turn that song off! turn that song off!"). Yes, today I heard it on the radio and was able to listen to it the whole way through. Big deal, right? Well, as you know, I used to be Jesse's girl, so, that song had a certain significance (remember J-that song would follow us wherever we went, even at the freakin' Rascal Flatts concert!) and now that I am no longer Jesse's Girl, that song was hard to hear for awhile. But now? Bring on the Rick Springfield, baby!!!!!!!!

The Idiot People strike again

This time it was in the form of Night-time Snow Drivers. You know who you are. It just took me an hour to get home and we only have a HALF INCH OF SNOW. What in the hell is wrong with people? And why do people drive with their hazards on when it snows? Is this some kind of state law I'm not following, or what? Could someone give me the 411 on that please? Thanks. So, it's now 11pm and I am wired from my crazy drive home (not to mention my 13 hour work day, but that's beside the point....) and I have to be up again in another 7 hours. It's a vicious cycle. Got another 13 hour work day tomorrow. I'm not complaining-it was smooth sailing at the crisis line tonight, I think I took maybe 5 or 6 calls in five hours, not a bad nights work right there! I am, however, ready for this week to be over and for the weekend to begin. Is that too much to ask?

My daddy shot hisself, but it's alright

American Idol rules! Did you watch it last night? It wasn't quite as good as some of the other episodes, but it did feature Big Bird lady. She tried to pass as 26 but was really 50 and was dressed in head to toe furry yellow. Yikes. And what about the poor girl talking about how her daddy is paralyzed because he shot hisself cuz he caught her stepmomma cheatin' on him, so he shot her too...but it's alright. Uh, what? Are you sure she isn't from these parts? Sounds like something that may happen here.....After American Idol I watched that show "House", I'd never seen it before, but it was pretty good. Then I went to bed. At 9:00. Hey, I was tired (and cold, so I really just wanted to be under my blankies). Last night was my last night of freedom for the week. I work my part-time job tonight and tomorrow night. Then I have plans on both Friday and Saturday nights (it hurts to be this popular, it really does).


Tomorrow is February. Hard to believe-time sure does fly. Well, must get back to work, I'm sure I have something productive I need to be doing. Have a good day, y'all!

great book

I just finished reading "My Sister's Keeper". It is a must read. I cried (some may not be shocked by this, but trust me, I guarantee you'll cry too if you read it).

Party on Wayne, party on Garth

Ok, birthday plans are in full swing. If you got an email, you know the 411. If I forgot anyone, please let me know. It is sure to be the social event of the year (I am soooooo being sarcastic).

I am totally freezing at work today. Yeah, I know it's only like 14 degrees outside, but I think it may only be 14 degrees inside as well. I mean, seriously! It's cold people! I had a hospital reviewer this morning ask me if I was drunk. Now, maybe it's because I didn't know what day of the week it was, or maybe it's because he works at a substance abuse treatment center and is looking for new business. Or, maybe it's because I'm drunk at 9:30am....at work. I don't know.

Day trip to Wentzville

Ok, so it's not really a day trip, but it did take me an hour each way to get to Aunt Mary's house in Wentzville (I was in the car for TWO HOURS-who does that sound like, Red?????). Anyway, my baby cousin Ben was in town, he just came back from overseas in Qatar. We got to meet his fiancee, Ashlee. She is A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E! And she was able to hold her own with our gigantic, sometimes obnoxious family. Ben-she's a keeper! Aunt Mary decided to have a family dinner so we could all see Ben and meet Ashlee (they actually live in South Dakota). A family gathering with our clan is never boring. My lovely, darling sister got herself locked in the bathroom and at the same time managed to get her 3-inch heel stuck in the heat register. Sorry, Red, but I warned you that would make the blog! :) Then there was also my 15 year old cousin Kelly who took a header down the stairs and wound up with a rather large scratch on her face.....that gracefulness must be genetic....the dinner was fun though, and, as always, I love seeing my family.

I also got a nice surprise on Saturday. My brother Timbo called to advise me he was on his way to St. Louis. Seems he was heading to the hockey game with some dudes from work and informed me that, afterwards, we were all gonna "party". Uh....what? I'm almost 31 years old...I don't so much "party" anymore. But anyway....our "partying" consisted of me, Tim and Jon sitting on the couch watching Arrested Development (great show, by the way) and playing with Chloe. It was OUT OF CONTROL. I wasn't sure I was gonna be able to drive myself home........

Now, another week is upon us. We are slammed today at work. Luckily, I do not work job #2 tonight (but I will Wed and Thu). Next weekend is already packed. And then the next weekend is icky birthday weekend. Plans are still developing for that. I know we are doing something, I just don't know what or where. Stay tuned.

Long time, no post

Ok, so it's only been two days, but for me, that's a long time to go without posting. What's going on, party people? Not much here. Just working, working, working. You'd think I'd have something to show for all the working I do-but you'd be wrong. It's ok though. I ain't complaining. Life in the world of managed care is good. I really do enjoy my job and my co-workers make the day a blast. I enjoy the crisis line as well. Working there part-time is much less stressful than full-time. I like it because it keeps my clinical skills up. Not that I don't use my clinical skills at my full time job, but at least at the crisis line I am assessing the clients directly.


Not much else has been going on, unfortunately for me. Very excited about my upcoming trip to Phoenix (GO CUBS!). Not so much excited about my upcoming birthday, but can't do much about that one. Not sure what the plans are for that day, but I know I'm being forced to go out. Stay tuned.

I don't really have much else to say. Sorry. My evening tonight is going to consist of the following: 1. put jammies on as soon as I get home, 2. watch tv, and 3. go to bed. You're jealous, aren't you?

Welcome Aidan Kyle!

My girl Sharon had her 2nd baby on Sunday. Meet Aidan Kyle. Isn't he cute? He joins big sister Sophia who will be two tomorrow (HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOPHIA!). Sharon first fessed up about her pregnancy as we played in the ocean together on Hilton Head Island this summer....ah, seems like yesterday....anyway, Congratulations Sharon! I love ya and miss you much! Can't wait to meet Aidan!

Can you say "the day from hell"????

My head hurts. I'm cranky, I ain't gonna lie. Today just plain sucked. My only saving grace is that I am not working job #2 tonight (not that I don't love it, but truuuuuust me, you wouldn't want me there tonight!). We were crazy busy with cases at work today (this was apparently the weekend to go completely insane). Lots of cases is fine, I type fast, I wasn't concerned. What made me have to stay late, however, was 1. the phone lines went down and 2. the computer kept freezing and erasing information. I really thought I might scream. I didn't, but I wanted to. I did threaten to throw my computer out the window, to stab someone (no one in particular) and check myself in to a psych unit-I'll have you know none of the above occurred, thank you very much. One of my reviewers in Kansas City told me that I was the most hyper cranky person he had ever talked to. I think that was a compliment.....anyway, I'm finally home now and plan to do a whole lot of NOTHING.

In more exciting news, Erin and I finalized our plans to go to Cubs Spring Training in Phoenix. We leave March 7. I sooooo can't wait. We contemplated driving to save some money, but quickly changed our minds when we realized it was a 21 hour drive from St. Louis...uh....no. Then we thought Amtrak may be the way to go, but they do not have a route from STL to Phoenix, so we went back to plan A and are flying. Get your drammamine ready now! We are gonna see the Cubbies play the Padres and the Brewers. It is gonna be some good times! We went two years ago and had a blast. It's my present to myself for working so damn hard. You better believe I will be doing all the extra shifts I can to pay for it. Chris, are you opposed to me doing 40 hours a week there? (kidding).

Happy Birthday Michael!

Happy Birthday to my cousin Michael, who turns the big 3-1 today. You know what that means-my 31st birthday is only 18 days away (yep, he beat me out for the prestigious Oldest Grandchild award....). Anyway, Mike, hope you are having a great birthday, saving lives at the naval hospital. Love ya much!

I swear, I'm not a cutter

Ouch is right! Mom-remember that black bowl you got me for like a $1 at Wal-Mart? Well, the damn thing FLEW off my counter today and shattered into a million little pieces on the floor. I tried to be careful picking it up, but I did somehow manage to cut myself. No, it's not life threatening, and doesn't require stitches. It does hurt though, and as I watched it bleed (sick, huh?), I realized it could be misconstued as cutting. Self-mutilating. Whatever the kids are calling it nowadays. If I was a real cutter, I wouldn't be whining about how much it hurts, rather, I'd be telling you some BS line about how cutting releases my pain, stuff like that....yes, I have worked in the mental health world for too long. I'm gonna go nurse my wound now, aka, go put a Band-Aid on it.

I'm a magnet

Yes, if you are an obnoxiously drunk dude who has been sitting at the bar for hours, waiting for new prey, you WILL hit on me. It's what I attract. I can't help it. Going to see Powder Peg was an adventure last night. Erin and I braved the unknown (rural St. Charles County) and traveled in search of the Portage Grill. The drive was fine, then it began snowing, then snowing a bit harder, then a bit harder after that. Driving to Portage Des Sioux reminded me of all those rural highways in Dent County. I actually thought that's where I was for a minute (but that's just cuz I was disoriented. And, yes, I was driving). Just when we thought were were lost in Deliverance Territory, we found the road sign for Highway J. As well pulled into the big town (population around 300), we knew right away where the happenin' hot spot was-and Powder Keg was already rockin' the house. We met up with Aunt Diane and some of her work friends (Aunt D-that one lady was NOT right! I loved her!). I thought the band sounded great. Then there were the two drunk dudes at the bar. One actually grabbed my arm, which was waaaaaay uncool, you do not touch me without previously obtained permission.....the other would have been cute (I guess) if he wasn't so wasted. He kept staring at me from across the bar, and making excuses to walk by me. I was, of course, horrified. Erin and my aunt thought it was funny, however. And all night, Erin kept saying "Kerri's got a new boyfriend". Real supportive friends, huh???? :) Oh, and Mikey Poo, your name came up. They for real played some Toby Keith and we all thought of you. Isn't that sweet??? ;) I did a shot with Uncle Jimmy (peppermint schnaps-Grandpa would have been so proud!). We decided to leave fairly early because the weather really was pretty bad. Everything was covered with snow. I let Erin drive since she was sober (wasn't that responsible of me?). It took us over an hour to get home. We had to go about 35 mph most of the way, but we made it home, alive and well. I fully intended to go to church today, but remembering how bad the roads were last night, I can't imagine they have them fully cleaned off yet, and I really didn't want to drive in that crap. So, here I am at home when I should be at church. I think I'm gonna go do the dishes. Doesn't that sound like fun? Anyone wanna help?

West of East Jesus???

From left to right: Aunt Mary, my cousins Rachel, Kelli and Chelsea, my sister Kristy, Aunt Jan, Aunt Paula, me and Aunt Cheryl. Mommy-you must come to the next one!!! We missed you!


Aunt Paula-I'm sorry I stabbed you in the leg with my fork. The Diet Coke made me do it.

Our "girls lunch" was fun. Granted we at at a Ruby Tuesday's that, I swear, was roughly 40 miles west of East Jesus. Or in O'Fallon. Same thing. We did a lot of laughing, which I always like. I do it often. The "girls lunch" consisted of myself, my sister, my aunts and my female cousins. I felt really, really old as Chelsea and Kelli talked about getting their drivers permits. When did that happen? There is no way they are old enough for that.....there is no way I'm old enough for them to be old enough.....See our pic above. Yes, Aunt Cheryl, I stole it from the family blog. I cannot tell a lie........Red and I went to the mall afterwards and had fun, just talking and laughing like sisters do. We must make it a regular gig, sister dear!

We are hittin' the town tonight. By "town" I mean Portage Des Sioux. Where the hell is that, you may ask? Well, that's a very good question. I'll let you know if I find it. Erin and I are gonna go lookin' for cute cowboys, right Ern? You know I'm a sucker for a hick accent and a nice ass....whoops! Was that out loud? I'm sorry, the Diet Coke made me do it.......

You got my vote!

Robyn-now we can finally get our "Hilary in '08" bumper stickers just like we envisioned three years ago....whenever she wins the Democratic vote, I say she has Barack Obama as her VP, whaddya think? I'm sorry, I know a lot of my family votes Republican, and I don't know a ton about politics, but what I do know is that the Democrats typically support the causes that are important to me (the poor and the mentally ill as an example), so I know who I'm voting for. Besides, its America-we have the right to vote for whomever we want, right? GO HILARY!

This just in

Calling all Canadians! Calling all Canadians! Did you know you have your own Idol competition? It's true, anyone from Inuit to the plains of Saskatchewan, from the beautiful shores of Nova Scotia to the mountains of British Columbia can try out! So, dust off your Bryan Adams CD's, pull out your Celine Dion's greatest hits, because you're gonna be a star, baby! There will be many Quebequois and Canucks aiming for the prestigious title of "Canadian Idol". Might I suggest you purchase your performance outfit at Zellers? And perhaps your try out song could be "God Save The Queen". I think it's gonna be a big year for Canadian Idol. I really do. Good luck to all!

Happy Birthday Reed!

Today is Mr. Reed's FIFTH birthday! Happy birthday little man. He's my friend Carrie's baby. I soooo can't believe he is 5 already....geez!

American Idol try-outs: My Personal Commentary

Ok, I missed it last night, but I watched it tonight and OMG, American Idol is hilarious. Are these people for real? Do they really think they sing well? Did you guys see the chick with the bleach blond hair that sang "Dontcha" by the Pussycat Dolls? WOW, is all I have to say. She was beyond horrible. And the chick that sang "Tender Roni"? Isn't that an old-school Bobby Brown song? She had no idea how much she sucked. I liked the brother and sister that both made it-they were really good. They were the minority, however (in goodness, that is). Oh and the poor guy that sang "Unchained Melody"? He looked crushed when they told him no. Of course, he was really, really, really bad. Poor thing never had a chance. He said his co-workers encouraged him to tryout. Bet they were doing it just to make fun of him. I swear, if I hear "Ker Bear, you should try out for American Idol, no really", I am gonna run in the opposite direction....Wow, and the little fat kid who did "God Bless America"? I think he may have been a little, um.....slow. And his buddy that did 'NSync? Simon told him he looked like a jungle animal...and, actually, he kinda did.....my absolute favorite of the night was the red headed guy who did "Bohemian Rhapsody". Queen never sounded so awful.....I thought his head was going to start spinning when he was told he wasn't gonna make it. Ah, that show sure did entertain me tonight. Now, I'm going to bed.

the scary red-headed guy

hyper hyper hyper

today I got told by one of my hospital reviewers that he is entertained by my voicemails, he called me "perky", then suggested perhaps I tone it down with the Diet Coke, he suggested I drink the Diet Coke in the gold can (that is the one without caffeine), I told him that was crazy talk, he told me that when he comes to St. Louis in February he is going to bring me some Jolt cola......can anyone see me on Jolt? Heaven help us all! :)

and yes, I am a little hopped up on caffeine today. And NO Amy, I have NOT been eating Skittles......I swear! :)

Dōmo arigatō, Mr. Roboto

I think our guy at the Japanese restaurant last night hated me. Let me explain. The Book Club girls and I decided to branch out and have this month's book club out-we chose a Japanese restaurant (I know, we are out of control....), Kobe, on Olive. Have y'all gone to one of these places before? You know, where you sit at a long table and the chef cooks the food in front of you? They also talk to you the whole time and try to entertain you. It is some good times. Let me tell you why I think our chef didn't like me. I must start by letting you all know that I am a little ADHD. I know, it's true. See, when there is too much noise and people and stuff going on, I can't focus. That, and I was really tired last night. So, every time our chef asked me a question (because this is supposed to be an interactive experience, dontcha know?), I answered him with either "what?" or "huh?", followed by a blank expression on my face. He was like "don't you understand my English?". I was kinda out of it. I think I pushed him over the edge when I refused to try to catch a piece of shrimp in mouth. The food was good, however, they give you tons there. After dinner, someone came up with the idea to go get some ice cream, so we went to Cold Stone Creamery. I had never been there before, but people rave about it. The choices of ice cream are overwhelming there. I couldn't take it, so I ordered strawberry. I'm all about simplicity. And not making my head hurt. We had a ton of fun there, we sat on the big leather couches and laughed a lot (I'm sure it had to do with the sugar high at 9pm. I know I have sworn off sugar, but it was for Book Club dammit!). I love when Renee announced she was leaving and no one looked up (besides me), so she yelled "bitches", again, no one looked up, so she yelled "bitches and hoes", again no one looked up. I thought that was hilarious (again, sugar high), the girls finally looked up to see what was so funny. I guess you had to be there.

So, I am tired again today. The good news is, tonight is the only night I don't have something to do, so I plan to fully take advantage of that. I'm just gonna go home and chill. Maybe take the trash out, do some dishes and laundry (wait, that is not chillin'!). And I am for sure gonna watch American Idol. I have such an exciting life, don't I? (all you smart asses, don't answer that!).

things I am lovin' this week

1. The new Fallout Boy song "This Is Not A Scene, It's An Arms Race". They are awesome.
2. Barak Obama running for president in '08. I won't be able to decide between him or Hilary...
3. My new hair color. It's dark. It's highlighted. It's no longer gray. It rocks.
4. American Idol starting again. I really haven't been able to watch it the last few years due to working nights. I will now become an addict and work my part-time job around it.
5. My new jeans that cost me nothing since I got them with a gift certificate. I got asked today if they were a size 4. I love these people I work with........

MIKEY! I want you back at work. It is way too quiet without you. Amy and I cannot carry the obnoxious load by ourselves. We need you.

Happy Birthday Baby Jeffy!

It is my cousin Jeff's birthday today. He isn't so much a baby, what are you, like 29 now? And about to be a father at that....anyway, hope you have a great birthday cousin! Hope Jessica and Baby Twyman are doing great as well. Miss you guys!

reason #927 why I will NOT go to the gym at work

As I walked by the gym at work today, I noticed there is a giant cartoon CLOWN HEAD on the door. Who in the hell thought that was a good idea? I mean seriously? Come to think of it, the giant clown head is reasons 1-926 as well. That ain't right.

The poll mysteriously changed......

I don't know how it happened..... ;)

Sunday Bloody Sunday

Really, all I was doing was quoting a U2 song. Calm down. ;)

Well, I managed to leave the apartment just long enough to go rent some movies. I know some of you may be surprised (J knows oh so how excited I was to sit and watch movies, right J? I believe the challenge was to see how long I could stay awake....), but today just feels like a sit around and watch movies kind of day. And I got to rent the movies that I wanted to see. Yes, that's right-chick flick galore! Ok, so Talladega Nights isn't a chick flick, but it is pretty damn funny ("I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey"). I also got "The Break Up". Appropriate, huh? I only got a little sappy and sad watching it. And I only cried once. :(That Jennifer Anniston gets me every time! I also made my homemade chili, which is pretty damn good if I do say so myself. I did about six loads of laundry and I thought about doing the dishes. Pretty exciting day, huh? B)

Is it today or tomorrow?

Robyn A! For the last 17 years, I have believed your birthday was January 15, but I just got something emailed to me that said it is today, January 14. Which one is the truth? Have I been wishing you a happy birthday on the wrong day for all these years? And did you just catch that? We have known each other for SEVENTEEN years. Good Lord. That doesn't even seem possible! But it's true-we met in 9th grade. Just 14 years old, now we're.....well, never mind that....Anyway, whatever day it is-HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I hope you have a great one. I love ya and miss ya tons, I am so sad we didn't get together for Christmas. Here's an idea-let's get together and find the time to road trip to Texas to see Lizzard. Whaddya think????


I thought this joke went well with today's theme of me being confused about what day is Robyn's actual birthday:

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me.....I know we've been friends for a long time..... but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"

I am SO not angry and bitter.....

eye-graine

I think I made that word up, but today, it's what I have. A migraine headache that is centered around my right eye. Very random, I know. It hurts like a son-of-a-%&$###. Seriously. Along with my eye-graine is it's good friend, nausea. Fun, good times, had by all. I have some blurred vision in my eye that the experts at webmd assure me is normal.....I'm pretty sure what triggered it is that I slept too much last night. I took advantage of the fact that I could sleep in today and now I am paying the price. It's feeling a bit better now that I have taken what I am sure is more than the recommended dosage of ibuprofen....Now that my headache has lifted a bit, I am working on the one project I have been avoiding for quite some time. Mainly, because thinking about it is overwhelming. And makes me want to cry. Yes, folks, I am CLEANING OUT MY CLOSET. It is a daunting task, for sure. So much so, that I must do it in shifts. My latest break is almost over.....

Mom, you'd be happy to know that I put that Old Navy gift card to good use. Thanks to their sales and the gift card from you, I was able to get two new shirts, a pair of jeans AND a coat. Pretty good, huh?

Happy Birthday today to my Uncle Craig. Hope you are having a great day!

Hope y'all are staying inside and safe from the first Ice Storm of 2007. Anyone lost their power? I still have mine, but the second wave of the storm is supposed to hit tonight, so here's hopin' I don't wake up in the middle of the night because my apartment temp is below freezing (because the electricity went out, get it?). I was supposed to have dinner with friends tonight, however, the pending storm has put those plans on hold (we really didn't want our 5 month pregnant friend driving in this weather! Right, Heidi?). Ugh, looks like a cozy night in with me, myself and I. And a good book. And my blankies. And some extra ibuprofen, just in case.

If you ever needed proof that God exists...

I have the proof for you. Today, two boys from around the St. Louis area that had been kidnapped were found-ALIVE. One of the boys had been missing since Monday. The other one (and this is the absolutely amazing part) had been missing for FOUR AND A HALF YEARS. And he was found alive. It is nothing short of a miracle. It has been all over the news today. I would get chills just hearing about it. Imagine how happy their families must be. I can't even imagine what it would be like. I know the man that kidnapped them will get what's coming to him-or at least I hope he does. There is no telling what those boys have had to go through. People, if you have kids, hug them and tell them you love them-ASAP!

Fainting at the porn store

Yep, it's true. I once fainted at a porn store. Now, mom and dad, don't get all worked up. I was at the porn store for a school assignment-I swear.

Back when I was in grad school, I took a class called Sexual Counseling (not that I planned on becoming a sex therapist, mind you. The class was required, I think). Anyway, our professor (known simply as Ellen) made all of us take a trip to any local porn store. We had to look around, check stuff out, then write a paper about our experience. Well, my friend Anita and I decided to go together and had plans to meet one Saturday afternoon (at the Dr. Johns on St Charles Rock Road, in case you care). So, before we met, I had plans to give blood at my church. I gave my blood, was feeling pretty good (I have a history of fainting after giving blood), no signs of fainting, so I ate my cookies and juice and off I went to the porn store.

Now, being the mature woman that I am, I only giggled a couple of times at the porn store. I mean, come on, some of that crap is just plain funny! At some point, I started to feel a bit woozy (this was a good hour after I'd given blood), but figured it was just because it was July and I was hot. Anita must have noticed it too because she said "your coloring isn't too good" (funny, my doctor just said that too me a couple of weeks ago when he was afraid I was gonna faint in his office). Next thing you know, I am down on the ground, I was only out for a couple of seconds, and kinda disoriented when I woke up. Anita got me out to the car and blasted the air conditioning. Good lord-I had just fainted in a porn store!

Well, I still had to write my paper about my experience. So, being the smart ass that I am, I made sure to include the whole dramatic scene where I faint in the middle of the store amongst the porn videos and butt plugs. Everyone got a good laugh. I got an A on that paper.

Yes, it's January 11....

....and I am just now taking down my Christmas decorations. I know, I am white trash, so sue me. In my defense, I have hardly been home, been out of town, working two jobs and when I am actually home, the last thing I want to do is move, much less take down decorations. All will be down tonight, however. It's time. Way past time. Gotta enjoy this energy ride while it lasts because there is no tellin' when it will happen again.....

update to the poll

I got permission from my ex-boyfriend to put the full title to Answer #1 on the poll. Please make note of this. Thanks. See Mike-now you can change your vote!

Two things I want noted for the record

1. I am wearing my size 4 jeans today.
2. I am starting to lose my voice. Thanks Cathy. You better not have given me your I Lost My Voice Disease. Can you imagine a world in which KD couldn't speak? Sounds blissful, doesn't it????

whew! I'm out of my funk!

blah (blä) Informal.n.
Worthless nonsense; drivel.
blahs A general feeling of discomfort, dissatisfaction, or depression: “Monday morning Oscar woke up with the blahs” (New Yorker).
adj. Dull and uninteresting.
Low in spirit or health; down: sat around all day feeling blah.
[Imitative of meaningless talk.]
blah blah adv.

After just feeling blah and sleepy the last few days, I am finally out of whatever funk I was in. I know you missed me-don't lie. Today I was dancing with Mike in the aisles at work. Clearly, I am feeling better. We have also been practicing our word of the week. Today's word is "aiight". My co-worker Anne has a deck of cards that have various, uh, street terms on them. About once a week, we draw a card to determine the new word of the week, then we have to use it in a sentence, as in "that guy is aiight". It's pretty funny hearing a bunch of white people try to be street. We are easily entertained, huh? Some of my past favorites include: "dime out", "tap" and "mack". Good times.

It's almost the weekend again-yay! I am gonna try my best to have a low key weekend. After having been out of town for the last two weekends, I just wanna chill. I am getting my hair done tomorrow (good bye gray, hello highlights!) and may do happy hour with my sister. I am also doing dinner with my friends Renee and Heidi on Saturday. Thats about it, other than the usual-grocery shopping, cleaning, etc. I'm not working at all this weekend-yahoo.

Anyone else doing anything fun? I really wanna go bowling for some reason. Or to the movies. Any takers???????

20,000 miles

My car hit 20,000 miles yesterday. It's only 9 months old. Wow. I drive a lot. Good times.

So, anyway, I am still tired but doing better today. I am not working at my second job tonight, so I plan to do nothing but relax this evening. Oh, I need to clean my apartment, but somehow, I don't see that happening tonight.

Happy Birthday to Stephen today. I think he is like 47 or something. Have a good birthday dude!

Here are some pics from Christina's wedding:

This is Krista's hair pre-done. Nice, huh?

On the top is Christina and her sister, Cathy, being inappropriate with the elk.....On the bottom is our drunk bride.....

On the top, its Book Club! Shannon, Me, Renee, Christina, Maggie, Krista and Cheryl. On the bottom, another pic of some of the book clubbers. Cute, huh?

The bride with her winter cape. What happened to the "muff" idea, Christina?????

so freakishly sleepy-Day 2

Why oh why am I so tired? Ugh. Everyone at work is way hyper today and I am just sitting here in a zone. The main reason I am typing a blog entry is to make sure I stay awake. I woke up to my alarm this morning (which rarely happens, I usually wake up before it goes off). Thus far, I barely remember my drive to work and while in the bathroom at work, I ran into the paper towel dispenser. I'm a mess. Of course, I also have to work five hours at Job #2 tonight, I'm sure that's gonna go well....I'm thinking this weekend may need to be a chill weekend. I've been out of town the last two and really haven't had two days in a row to just hang out. I soooo need that.

I've decided I am moderating my diet plan. I think I'm gonna go with what my dad suggested all along. Just cut out the sugar. He has lost probably 20 pounds and kept it off for like two years simply by cutting out sugar. Yes, that will mean no more Skittles, but, really, I've been Skittle free for quite some time. I think I can do it.

Roadtrip to Quincy quote list

Granted, funny quotes are usually only funny to those that were around to hear them. Nonetheless, I must list our quotes from the weekend. It should be noted that most of them are by Krista. Who knew she was so full of one liners????? She had us rolling.....

The following are from Krista, with love:

While talking about a completely unrelated topic, Krista suddenly says "I hope the cake is good". To which I replied "Hello, random".

Later, Krista says, out of the blue, "there's also a new person in town, he drives a big van and you get in it and exercise".......uh, what???

While in the hotel, Maggie is talking about something and Krista says "I never would have thought of doing that because I would have never thought of it'. Uh....ok.....

And later, while getting dressed for the wedding, Krista says "I'm trying to get my thong on and it's getting all twisted". Thanks for the info.....

During the wedding, Krista hit us with "I love nuts with my cake", "I need more ass bags" and "Book Club.....in bed".

Also said, but not by Krista:

"My swimming suit is ribbed". Renee announced this, to which I said "for her pleasure?". I won't even begin to explain why she had a swimsuit in January....

And, perhaps my favorite quote, Renee, around 1am or so, yells for me to come into the bathroom with her and she says "what the hell, just shave my hairy neck". I almost wet my pants with that one......

new poll

Please vote. It's very important. Its all about what my theme for 2007 should be. Please note, choice #1's official title is much longer than "The Quest for Love", however, out of respect for any ex-boyfriends that may read this blog, I left the full title out because it was just plain mean. My boy Mike knows the full title, and he knows that is why I placed my vote for choice #1....happy voting!

I am oh so very tired.....

I love my friends, but sometimes, four of you in a hotel room is just too much. None of us slept last night. My head has that swimming feeling. Yet, I agreed to work at the crisis line today, not knowing I'd be going in on no sleep. Yikes.

Our roadtrip to Quincy, IL for Christina's wedding was fun. Renee, Krista, Cheryl and I did a lot of laughing. It was quite a boring drive scenery-wise (other than the house with the yard full of chickens). Once we got to our hotel, we ran into Maggie and Matt and Bruce and several other people that were apparently in town for the wedding (it was quite the event, apparently!). The wedding was nice and Christina looked really beautiful. The reception was at the local Elks Lodge (ALWAYS a good time. "Ride the Elk", right Shannon????). Everyone was having a good time dancing (and drinking). I didn't really drink, wasn't feeling it. Didn't really dance either. I was a party pooper (I'm getting old, what can I say????). We went back to the hotel and watched a really bad Lifetime movie and went to sleep. In theory. I really didn't sleep at all and next thing I knew it was morning.

So, now, here I am, almost three hours in to my shift at the crisis line. So far, so good. The calls haven't been so bad (knock on wood). I can't wait to go home and go to bed though.....

Coming soon, random quotes from the roadtrip. I'd do them now, but I left them all at home (we wrote them down, of course) and I want to ensure accuracy.

Happy 34th Anniversary Mom and Dad!!!!

Whew! 34 years! I can't imagine being with someone for that long without wanting to kill them. I mean, seriously. Nowadays, 34 years is like some kind of world record, or something. Yes, tomorrow is my parents 34th wedding anniversary. Can ya believe it? I'd blog tomorrow, but I'll be at a wedding (someone else in the world is choosing to have their wedding day on January 6!). Mom, dad-back on January 6, 1973, did you in a million years imagine you'd be here today? You know, with three of the most awesome, wonderful children two people could ask for.....I'm betting that they go out to dinner on Saturday and will either go to a. Applebee's, b. Steak and Shake, or c. St. Louis Bread Company. You see, in their neck of the woods, the choice of "eateries" (dad's word, not mine) is limited. In fact, just to go to one of those three places, they have to drive to a town that's 30 miles away. If they stay in Salem, their options would be either the half Taco Bell/half KFC or the skanky McDonalds......

In all seriousness, Mom and Dad-I hope you have a great anniversary. You give me hope that someday I, too, will find someone who wants to be with me for 34 years (although if I don't get going, that may be cut short due to general life expectancy. I don't think I'm gonna live to be 107). I love you guys much. Have fun at the Bread Company......

KD's rant of the day

Know what song I absolutely HATE? "Lips of an Angel" by Hinder. Why do I hate it so much, you may ask? Well, I'll tell you. I hate the whole premise of the song. Basically, you have a guy who has recently begun talking to his ex again, he has a girlfriend mind you, but is still talking to the ex, even wishes the current girlfriend was the ex sometimes, and guesses they never really moved on, blah, blah, blah. That's called having an EMOTIONAL AFFAIR. In my book, that's worse than an actual physical affair. I mean, would you like it if your boyfriend was constantly talking to his skank whore ex with you in the next room?????

Cheer for the Chiefs?????

I'm not sure I can do it. One of my hospital reviewers in Kansas City asked me this morning if we over here in STL would consider cheering for the Chiefs this weekend. I don't know. I like my reviewer and all (she's way good times), however, I just don't think I have it in me to cheer for the Chiefs. I just have a long standing dislike for the team. I mean, come on, they play at Camaro-head Stadium for God's sake. How could you support that?

Another birthday already?

I'm really not feeling my birthday this year. I know it's surprising, because every year I like to celebrate it and throw a huge bash. But this year, I was kinda hoping to keep it quiet. No such luck. I was informed by my friend Tanya tonight that plans are already being made for the big 3-1. Granted, it's still a month away, but she figured she'd better tell me now, since it's a Friday night and all. I will keep all those in my social circle updated when I know more! As long as it involves 1. everyone pretending I'm still 29 and 2. everyone supplying me with drinks, I think it will be ok. Now, it is my girl Erin's birthday that day too, so she must be included in whatever it is we are gonna be doing.....Getting old sucks, but at least I have some great friends willing to help me celebrate and remind me of it. Thanks guys. You're the best.

ERN! I think I ate too much sugar-free candy!

Yes, Erin and I have discovered the joys of sugar-free candy. Day 3 of South Beach Phase 1 is going well. Yes, I'm a little tired of eating veggie omelettes, but so far, so good. Sugar-free candy nowadays really isn't so bad.

I got my new cell phone yesterday. I was just so tired of my other one. The battery died nearly every day, I could barely hear callers. It just plain sucked. My new one is way cute (duh!), now if I can just figure out how to work it, I'll be in good shape!

I have run out of things to say. Yes, my life is that exciting.

new title-deal with it

I changed my blog title. "Thanks for playing" captures my always constant sense of sarcasm. I think it's gonna be the title of my yet-to-be-written book.Yes, that is my latest plan. Did you know that as far back as age 16 I've wanted to write a book? Actually, my 6th grade teacher told me I should become a writer. I recently had someone tell me I should write a book. What do y'all think about that?

Back to the old grind

No more short work weeks. The holidays are officially over, time for the same ol', same ol'. I am actually happy about it. I really just wanted to get the holidays and 2006 over with. Now it's a new year and a new outlook. I informed everyone at work today that my New Year's resolution is to be a bitch all year. So far? I'm doing really, really well......Ok, maybe not so much being bitchy just for the sake of being bitchy, what I mean by that is that no more Doormat Kerri. I'm standing up for myself and not taking any crap from anyone. Watch out world......Erin and I have restarted the South Beach Diet. Phase 1 sucks hardcore. Basically, you are eating nothing but vegetables and protein for 2 weeks. Absolutely NO sugar or carbs. I may die. I still have about 5-7 pounds to lose and should definitely be able to do so on South Beach. My measure is my size 4 jeans-they still fit, I just want them to be looser, thats all. It's a girl thing.

I'll be heading to the big town of Quincy, Illinois this weekend (breaking my ban on the entire state for one day only) for my friend Christina's wedding. Long awaited wedding, I should say. She and Chris have been together, what? 6-7 years now? I'm sure all will be fun. Nothing like a road trip to Quincy!!!! Yahoo!!!

Ok, must go now. I'm sure I've got some more people to bitch at today before I leave work. My work is never done..........

Happy New Year 2007!!!!

"Wait, I gotta finish my wine", said by Claire B., age 5, New Years Eve 2006

I never thought I'd hear a 5 year old say that, but that is, indeed what Claire said last night. We were at my friend Carrie's house (I cannot believe those kids made it to midnight-I barely made it to midnight) and we let the kids take part in the celebration with us-Sprite for them (with just a drop of champagne) and champagne for us. Oh, and fireworks for the men. Frightening. I saw BB with like six sparklers in his hands, and I got scared....real scared.....Anyway, New Year's Eve was fun. I was kinda in a bummed out mood (really ready to get 2006 over with already!), but once there I had fun with my friends like I always do. The food was great, the kids mostly stayed downstairs watching movies and the adults stayed upstairs for a rousing game of '80's Trivial Pursuit (Carrie and I were a team and we were the Care Bears-get it????) and watching "Jackass II"-SO not kid appropriate and every time one of the little munchkins would sneak up from the basement, you got to see eight adults scrambling to pause the movie or turn the tv screen off ( I really don't think it would have been good for the kids to see some stupid dude freeze his boys to a horse ice sculpture, do you????). We had quite the alcohol assortment, the ladies were making up drinks (that blueberry juice and champagne was pretty good!), and don't worry mom, I stayed sober as I was driving, but I did have to have my favorite Captain and Diet Coke as well as a glass of Carrie's sangria (to die for). I think I ate my weight in chicken wings and nachos, so I'm pretty sure my two drinks absorbed quickly.....I also received two voicemail messages from two very special kiddos wishing me a late Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. It brought tears to my eyes and I plan to call them back today just as soon as I'm fully awake..........I came home last night to find my microwave wasn't on, nor was my refrigerator. My first thought was did I pay the electric bill?, however, quickly realized that everything else was still on....so, this morning, I stumbled downstairs, in search of the circuit breaker box (I'm a genius, huh?). Luckily for me, all the little switches were labeled, I flipped off then on the kitchen ones and....tadaaaa! Both are back up and running now. I am the smartest girl alive......

With all that being said, I hope everyone had a great, and safe, New Years Eve. I hope you all have a wonderful 2007 like I plan to do. I had the realization last night that I have yet another birthday looming on the horizon. I'm not happy about it, but what can you do? I think celebrating the first anniversary of my 30th birthday will be fun....I'll be drunk so I don't have to remember it.....

I'll leave you with this. A quote that fought for top spot on the title line. It totally would have made it if Claire hadn't made her announcement about drinking her wine. Claire's adorable 2 year old sister, Sarah, entertained the adults with her rousing renditions of "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star", "Jingle Bells" and, my favorite "I'm a Little Tea Pot", only in Sarah's version, she said "I'm a little tea top, tea top, tea top".......complete with a VERY dramatic "pour me out", complete with jazz hands.....2 years olds ROCK. I love that kid.