HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!!

Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, I am really really freakin old, Happy Birthday to me!

Well, the day didn't start out so well, I'm hoping it will only go up from here. So, my car was on empty (thank God today is payday!), so I managed to make it to the gas station this morning only to find that the pump was broken. Ok, I can handle that, I think to myself, so I get to a pump that is working, go in, get myself some cappucino (turns out, it tastes like crap) and find that they were OUT of my 20 oz. Diet Coke (so not cool)....then, go back out to the car and the pump says "see attendant". I was a little panicked, especially since there should be plenty of money in my account. Turns out, it was just the receipt machine-thingy that was broken. Oh, and I forgot that the light at Chippewa was broken, and it stayed red for two cycles. I finally ran it-I'm sure the St. Louis PD are out looking for me now (everyone else did it too, ok?).

Once I got to work, it got better. My cube is all decorated with balloons and streamers AND I have a giant cookie cake that says "Happy Birthday Ker Bear" (awwwwww) AND a chocolate cake w/Skittles on top. My team loves me and I love them, its gonna be a good day DAMMIT!

It is also my friend Erin's birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERN!!!!!! And to Erin's mom-thank you so much for the birthday wishes and finding my blog! You can post anytime! :)

I have already talked to my mom this morning. I wasn't sure how to take it when she told me that this morning my dad said "our baby girl is 31, that just doesn't seem right". Uh, was he calling me old? I think he was.......I love you anyway daddy! :) My sister just texted me and I have lots of ecards in my inbox. Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone! I love you all, I really do.


Ok, I gotta actually do some work now. I'll see some of you tonight for dinner, drinks, and my favorite pasttime-making fun of people singing karaoke!

Happy Birthday Chris!!!!

Happy Birthday today to my crisis line supervisor, Chris! Have a good one! It was always fun when I worked there full time because her birthday is 2/8, mine is 2/9, and her sister, Laura's, is 2/10. The Aquarius girls. Good times. Anyway, Chris, hope you have a great birthday. Are you 29 again, too??????

4:30am

I woke up at 4:30am this morning and couldn't go back to sleep. That just ain't right. Especially when I gotta work 13 hours today. I'm not sure what that was about. Ok, and I have this bruise on the inside of my right arm and have no idea how it got there-but it hurts like hell, I can tell ya that much. I'm falling apart in my old age. I am trying to not be bummed out about my upcoming birthday. Not that I love being 30, but I HATE being 31. I know, I know, in the scheme of things, it's not that old. I'm just not where I thought I'd be in life by now. Ok, enough of the pity party. I'll focus on what I DO have-great friends who want to spend my birthday with me. I promise I won't be a party pooper on Friday! We will have fun. Get a couple drinks in me then I'll be ready to go! And you can forget the previously mentioned Rule #1 (pretend I'm 29), I will freely admit I am 31 so that I can hear people say "you don't look 31". People are gonna say that, right? RIGHT????

for the ladies

You know you go to a redneck church when...

1. ... the finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one.
2. ... people ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em.
3. ... when the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering," five guys and two women stand up.
4. ... opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday.
5.... a member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of".
6. ... the choir is known as the "OK Chorale".
7. ... in a congregation of 500 members, there are only ten last names in the church directory.
8. ... people think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy.
9. ... the baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized "Wheeling" washtub.
10. ... the choir robes were donated by (and embroidered with the logo from) Billy Bob's Barbecue.
11. ... the collection plates are really hubcaps from a'56 Chevy.
12. ... instead of a bell you are called to service by a duck call.
13. ... the minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks.
14. ... the communion wine is Boone's Farm "Tickled Pink".
15.... "Thou shall not covet" applies to huntin' dogs, too.
16. ... the final words of the benediction are, "Y'all come back now, Ya hear".

Winter poem

S**T IT'S COLD!!!!!!

Sleepovers and rubbers

So last night was our annual Book Club Sleepover (there is nothing like a group of grown women having a sleepover-really, it is SO much fun!) at Christina's new house (gorgeous, by the way). We were minus Sally because she had the NERVE to GIVE BIRTH the night before....Congratulations Sally and Chris!!! Little (and by "little", I mean nine and a half pounds) Declan Heath came into the world Friday night-I can't wait to meet him!!!!

The fun started with our drive out to Christina's. I swung by and picked Renee up since we live on the same street and all, things were going fine until we were on Hwy 270, suddenly I was like "uh, Renee, look behind us" (in a slightly panicked voice), because, you see, coming up on us fast was this big van with a giant ceramic dog on top of it. Seems Kennelwood Village thinks that's cute....I was just freaked out. Needless to say, Renee and I were laughing so hard I thought I was going to drive off the road. Then we stopped at Schnucks and I swear the name of the plaza was Monkey Plaza (it wasn't-clearly I can't read). By the time we got to Christina's we were worn out!

We first went to the Painted Zebra and painted pottery-SO much fun-especially watching Renee get frustrated with her vase and Krista who kept painting hers over and over and over again. I painted a vase as well-tried to match it to the colors of my living room. We'll see how well it turns out after they fire it in the kiln. We get to pick them up on Thursday. After that, we went back to Christina's, ordered pizza ("did we order three pizzas???"), ate a bunch of junk food (cheese dip, anyone?) and laughed-A LOT. We played a couple of board games-Team Short Bus lost again (yes, I'm on that team-did you have any doubt?). We played the board game "Imagine If", which quickly turned into "Let's tell each other all our dirty little secrets" (I won't discuss this further-we're keeping the blog clean people!!!). We did some drinking (the strawberry daiquiris were awesome), which may have been why we thought it was a good idea to tell all our dirty little secrets......There were, of course, many good one liners that came out of the night, nicely written on a paper plate. Here's a sample:

"There's a rubber!"-said by Cheryl, it had something to do with the smootie maker...
"Does the rubber go on the inside?"-said by Christina, supposedly regarding the smoothie maker....
"It's her time to go"-said by Krista, describing one of Scott's older relatives....nice.
"We haven't done Maggie in awhile"-said by Christina during our game of Imagine If.
"I squirted too hard on the third drop"-said by Scott (Krista's husband) as reported by Krista while on the phone with him...he was talking about putting their 2 year old's ear drops in, people!
"What's this a chunk of? It must be a strawberry because it's soft"-said by Cheryl, who was reading too much into her daiquiri....
"You've had others!"-said by Cheryl to Krista, talking about her "hookups" in college, to which Krista replied "Oh, lots, lots".
"You look at it and you stick it in there"-said by Shannon. I have no idea what this was regarding, however.....

So, overall, it was a really fun night, I didn't sleep much, but thats ok. Today is Super Bowl Sunday, I personally could care less, I think I'm gonna get caught up on my scrapbooking. Or take a nap.........

P.S. Krista-you owe me a date with Get 'Er Done!!!!!! :)

this year is the Cubs year????

This is my friend Sean (and fellow Cubs fan) with the World Series trophy. Yes, the Cardinals have the title for now, but a new season is about to start, pitchers and catchers report in like two weeks....I am so excited! I love baseball. I can't wait for Spring Training and the real deal to start in April. I don't know if my Cubbies are gonna be good this year or not (wishful thinking, but they DID make some great deals in the off-season). We shall see! As for the NL Central-BRING IT!!!!

name that band

Can you name the bands in this picture? There are actually over 70 of them. A hint to get you started...you'll find Matchbox 20, Blind Melon, Smashing Pumpkins, Guns-n-Roses, Queen, The Rolling Stones and many, many more! Good luck! And thanks to my cousin Dan's wife, Amy, for emailing me this! It provided hours of entertainment at work yesterday!

Do you remember? Don't lie! You know you do....

I remember watching Duck Tales after school. And yes, I can still sing the theme song...duck tales, woo hoo!

I remember this kid named Joe made a pair of Hammer pants in our 9th grade Home Ec class...they were HOT!

I LOVED The Babysitters Club! My sister and I literally had all the books (like 60 or 70 of them!)

Remember when Michael Jackson was still black? I had a huge poster of him over my bed (it's true!). Red and I used to listen to "Thriller" with the lights out and scared ourselves silly!

You know you had a stone washed jean jacket! I put New Kids On The Block pins all over mine!

And you know you wore flourescent! I remember this was about 7th or 8th grade for me. I know I had a pair of hot pink biker shorts....sexy, huh?

I loved this game! In fact, I played it with Jesse's daughters not all that long ago!

Now, the Ninja Turtles were more my brothers thing-he had all four of them-you know-the like 18 inch tall ones? And, yes I can name them all-Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello and Rafael!

Remember "I've fallen and I can't get up?"Classic.

Oh, the jelly shoes. I know I had some, don't remember what colors, though.

I remember making these friendship bracelets. They were really hard to make!

I LOVED He-Man! Watched it every day after school. If you play your cards right, I may even do the theme song for you...yes, I still remember it. Here's a sample "Only three others share this secret. Our friends The Sorceress, Man-At-Arms and Orco. Together, we defend the secrets of Castle GraySkull from the evil forces of Skeletor!". Sad, I know. I also remember playing He-Man with our cousins Matt and Chris on their farm in Illinois. We always made Red be the stupid girl, She-Ra, I wanted to be one of the cool boy characters! And who knew that He-Man would become a gay icon?

Oh, Hypercolor shirts. Who the hell thought that was a good idea?

What can I say about New Kids On The Block. I was in love with (and going to marry) Jordan. Red and I had our bedroom walls plastered with their pictures.We saw them twice-once at Six Flags and once at the old Arena. I thought I'd love them forever....

If a Saved By The Bell re-run was on right now, I'd watch it.

Did anyone have their birthday party at McDonalds? I don't think I ever did. Mom, didn't Tim have one there? Or am I making that up?

I totally had a Rainbow Brite doll. It was the coolest thing ever!

Remember tight rolling your jeans? I remember thinking there is no way I will every NOT tight roll my jeans.....

Oh, we had a slip and slide. Many summers of fun with that one....

You know you used to put your hair up in a banana clip!

Big hair. I had it in high school. Some people still have it....

Mullets. I am traumatized by my 4th grade mullet (and, no, you cannot see a picture of it). My mom says it was all the rage and I really wanted that cut. Horrifying.

Shot through the heart, and you're to blame! You give love a bad name. Enough said.

Wasn't that time fun? What other 80's/90's stuff do you remember?

Please don't touch my private parts

OMG, I swear I have never laughed harder in my life than I did tonight during my dinner with Renee and Heidi. Wow. My sides still hurt. You know most things are only funny if you were actually there. When you re-tell it, it just doesn't have the same "umph" that it did when it happened. That being said, let me tell ya all about it:

We met at our favorite neighborhood place, Biggie's, and quickly placed our orders-including the infamous waffle fries. I ordered first and told the waitress I wanted the chicken and broccoli, to which Renee replied "chicken and broccoli, what's that?". To which I replied, "uh....it's chicken.... and broccoli". We then cracked up and she called me a smart ass (go figure!). Later, a group of people walked past us to get to their table (the place is kinda small and all the tables are pretty close together), as they did, Renee "accidentally" elbowed the guy in his, um, area. She then says "I think I just elbowed him in his package". Again, mass laughter. After we calmed ourselves down from that one, we talked about normal stuff, you know, like what Heidi is going to name her baby (she won't tell us) and about her husband John being attacked by drug dealers (true story, he's ok, I'll leave it at that). Heidi then gets up to go to the bathroom (as a pregnant woman who just drank like 10 glasses of iced tea will do) and says to Renee before she leaves "please don't touch my privates". Yep you guessed it, again, mass laughter. I love it. Those girls are some good times.

Oh yea, I totally forgot to tell y'all about how I totally busted my ass yesterday in the parking lot at work. Yep, down on the ice I went. Landed on my left side, thought "ok, my pants are a little wet, but I'm fine", no biggie, right? When I got to the crisis line, my friend Tanya goes "why do you have dirt all over your pants?". Uh yea.....and today? A massive bruise on my upper leg and my knee. Oddly enough, they don't hurt. You see, when you injure yourself as often as I do (and not on purpose), you tend to not feel the pain any longer. Frightening, I know.

Well, I know it's friday night and I should be out "partying", or something, but I just don't have it in me tonight. I'm old, DAMMIT! I'm actually quite exhausted and the only thing I can focus on is reading my magazine then going to bed and sleeping as late as I want tomorrow. It really is the little things in life that can make you happy.......I lead an exciting life, don't I? Admit it, you're jealous.

waffle fries

I think it's actually gonna happen. Barring any acts of God, I think Heidi, Renee and I are finally gonna get our Biggie's night in! Yay! You know what that means.........WAFFLE FRIES!!! We're bringing our own potatoes, right Heidi? I soooo cannot wait. I have been eating good all week so that I can splurge on the waffle fries....is it 6:30 yet?

Heidi, protect the fetus, because I think I may be coming down with some sort of illness. Of course, most of the time, I never get a full blown cold or flu, no, I just have this underlying feeling like crap NOS (not otherwise specified). Well, my doctor always says that if what comes out of your nose is some strange color (yellow, green, hell even purple), then you probably have some sort of infection. I'll spare you the details, but suffice to say, I think this may be the case for me. It will not stop me from having fun this weekend, however. I totally cannot wait to hang with my girls tonight and tomorrow the Book Club girls and I are going to be painting pottery-fun, huh? It actually really is-I love it.

Who is your Super Bowl pick? I'm gonna go with....................I don't give a crap who wins, I ain't gonna lie. I didn't even know who was in it until last week. Who has the prettier uniform? I'll gowith them......

Pregnant people are so funny

My dear friend Heidi is so freakin' funny. She is expecting her first baby in May and let me tell you, being around her during her pregnancy is hilarious. From her random food cravings (waffle fries, anyone?) to her need to urinate every 15-20 minutes, there is never a dull moment.

Tonight, Heidi informed me that her belly button was, and I quote, "coming to the surface". I felt bad laughing out loud because she was very, very serious. She relates this story to me about how she noticed that the area around her belly button was dryer that the rest of her belly. So, to combat this, she used about a half bottle of cocoa butter lotion and noticed that her belly button was changing. Which, if your belly is growing, it's bound to happen. She is now freaked out and obsessed about this. And I just sit and laugh at her.

What else are friends for? By the way, the picture is NOT of Heidi.

Mom, sorry for the language.....

I thought this was pretty damn funny. Thanks Karen for a good laugh today, I have forwarded it on.....

YES!

People, today, for the first time, I was able to listen to the song "Jesse's Girl" without having some sort of negative reaction (usually turning the station very quickly, or skipping it on my iPod, or yelling "I hate that f***ing song, or in one case, having my friend Erin run across the room yelling "turn that song off! turn that song off!"). Yes, today I heard it on the radio and was able to listen to it the whole way through. Big deal, right? Well, as you know, I used to be Jesse's girl, so, that song had a certain significance (remember J-that song would follow us wherever we went, even at the freakin' Rascal Flatts concert!) and now that I am no longer Jesse's Girl, that song was hard to hear for awhile. But now? Bring on the Rick Springfield, baby!!!!!!!!

The Idiot People strike again

This time it was in the form of Night-time Snow Drivers. You know who you are. It just took me an hour to get home and we only have a HALF INCH OF SNOW. What in the hell is wrong with people? And why do people drive with their hazards on when it snows? Is this some kind of state law I'm not following, or what? Could someone give me the 411 on that please? Thanks. So, it's now 11pm and I am wired from my crazy drive home (not to mention my 13 hour work day, but that's beside the point....) and I have to be up again in another 7 hours. It's a vicious cycle. Got another 13 hour work day tomorrow. I'm not complaining-it was smooth sailing at the crisis line tonight, I think I took maybe 5 or 6 calls in five hours, not a bad nights work right there! I am, however, ready for this week to be over and for the weekend to begin. Is that too much to ask?

My daddy shot hisself, but it's alright

American Idol rules! Did you watch it last night? It wasn't quite as good as some of the other episodes, but it did feature Big Bird lady. She tried to pass as 26 but was really 50 and was dressed in head to toe furry yellow. Yikes. And what about the poor girl talking about how her daddy is paralyzed because he shot hisself cuz he caught her stepmomma cheatin' on him, so he shot her too...but it's alright. Uh, what? Are you sure she isn't from these parts? Sounds like something that may happen here.....After American Idol I watched that show "House", I'd never seen it before, but it was pretty good. Then I went to bed. At 9:00. Hey, I was tired (and cold, so I really just wanted to be under my blankies). Last night was my last night of freedom for the week. I work my part-time job tonight and tomorrow night. Then I have plans on both Friday and Saturday nights (it hurts to be this popular, it really does).


Tomorrow is February. Hard to believe-time sure does fly. Well, must get back to work, I'm sure I have something productive I need to be doing. Have a good day, y'all!

great book

I just finished reading "My Sister's Keeper". It is a must read. I cried (some may not be shocked by this, but trust me, I guarantee you'll cry too if you read it).

Party on Wayne, party on Garth

Ok, birthday plans are in full swing. If you got an email, you know the 411. If I forgot anyone, please let me know. It is sure to be the social event of the year (I am soooooo being sarcastic).

I am totally freezing at work today. Yeah, I know it's only like 14 degrees outside, but I think it may only be 14 degrees inside as well. I mean, seriously! It's cold people! I had a hospital reviewer this morning ask me if I was drunk. Now, maybe it's because I didn't know what day of the week it was, or maybe it's because he works at a substance abuse treatment center and is looking for new business. Or, maybe it's because I'm drunk at 9:30am....at work. I don't know.

Day trip to Wentzville

Ok, so it's not really a day trip, but it did take me an hour each way to get to Aunt Mary's house in Wentzville (I was in the car for TWO HOURS-who does that sound like, Red?????). Anyway, my baby cousin Ben was in town, he just came back from overseas in Qatar. We got to meet his fiancee, Ashlee. She is A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E! And she was able to hold her own with our gigantic, sometimes obnoxious family. Ben-she's a keeper! Aunt Mary decided to have a family dinner so we could all see Ben and meet Ashlee (they actually live in South Dakota). A family gathering with our clan is never boring. My lovely, darling sister got herself locked in the bathroom and at the same time managed to get her 3-inch heel stuck in the heat register. Sorry, Red, but I warned you that would make the blog! :) Then there was also my 15 year old cousin Kelly who took a header down the stairs and wound up with a rather large scratch on her face.....that gracefulness must be genetic....the dinner was fun though, and, as always, I love seeing my family.

I also got a nice surprise on Saturday. My brother Timbo called to advise me he was on his way to St. Louis. Seems he was heading to the hockey game with some dudes from work and informed me that, afterwards, we were all gonna "party". Uh....what? I'm almost 31 years old...I don't so much "party" anymore. But anyway....our "partying" consisted of me, Tim and Jon sitting on the couch watching Arrested Development (great show, by the way) and playing with Chloe. It was OUT OF CONTROL. I wasn't sure I was gonna be able to drive myself home........

Now, another week is upon us. We are slammed today at work. Luckily, I do not work job #2 tonight (but I will Wed and Thu). Next weekend is already packed. And then the next weekend is icky birthday weekend. Plans are still developing for that. I know we are doing something, I just don't know what or where. Stay tuned.

Long time, no post

Ok, so it's only been two days, but for me, that's a long time to go without posting. What's going on, party people? Not much here. Just working, working, working. You'd think I'd have something to show for all the working I do-but you'd be wrong. It's ok though. I ain't complaining. Life in the world of managed care is good. I really do enjoy my job and my co-workers make the day a blast. I enjoy the crisis line as well. Working there part-time is much less stressful than full-time. I like it because it keeps my clinical skills up. Not that I don't use my clinical skills at my full time job, but at least at the crisis line I am assessing the clients directly.


Not much else has been going on, unfortunately for me. Very excited about my upcoming trip to Phoenix (GO CUBS!). Not so much excited about my upcoming birthday, but can't do much about that one. Not sure what the plans are for that day, but I know I'm being forced to go out. Stay tuned.

I don't really have much else to say. Sorry. My evening tonight is going to consist of the following: 1. put jammies on as soon as I get home, 2. watch tv, and 3. go to bed. You're jealous, aren't you?

Welcome Aidan Kyle!

My girl Sharon had her 2nd baby on Sunday. Meet Aidan Kyle. Isn't he cute? He joins big sister Sophia who will be two tomorrow (HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOPHIA!). Sharon first fessed up about her pregnancy as we played in the ocean together on Hilton Head Island this summer....ah, seems like yesterday....anyway, Congratulations Sharon! I love ya and miss you much! Can't wait to meet Aidan!

Can you say "the day from hell"????

My head hurts. I'm cranky, I ain't gonna lie. Today just plain sucked. My only saving grace is that I am not working job #2 tonight (not that I don't love it, but truuuuuust me, you wouldn't want me there tonight!). We were crazy busy with cases at work today (this was apparently the weekend to go completely insane). Lots of cases is fine, I type fast, I wasn't concerned. What made me have to stay late, however, was 1. the phone lines went down and 2. the computer kept freezing and erasing information. I really thought I might scream. I didn't, but I wanted to. I did threaten to throw my computer out the window, to stab someone (no one in particular) and check myself in to a psych unit-I'll have you know none of the above occurred, thank you very much. One of my reviewers in Kansas City told me that I was the most hyper cranky person he had ever talked to. I think that was a compliment.....anyway, I'm finally home now and plan to do a whole lot of NOTHING.

In more exciting news, Erin and I finalized our plans to go to Cubs Spring Training in Phoenix. We leave March 7. I sooooo can't wait. We contemplated driving to save some money, but quickly changed our minds when we realized it was a 21 hour drive from St. Louis...uh....no. Then we thought Amtrak may be the way to go, but they do not have a route from STL to Phoenix, so we went back to plan A and are flying. Get your drammamine ready now! We are gonna see the Cubbies play the Padres and the Brewers. It is gonna be some good times! We went two years ago and had a blast. It's my present to myself for working so damn hard. You better believe I will be doing all the extra shifts I can to pay for it. Chris, are you opposed to me doing 40 hours a week there? (kidding).

Happy Birthday Michael!

Happy Birthday to my cousin Michael, who turns the big 3-1 today. You know what that means-my 31st birthday is only 18 days away (yep, he beat me out for the prestigious Oldest Grandchild award....). Anyway, Mike, hope you are having a great birthday, saving lives at the naval hospital. Love ya much!

I swear, I'm not a cutter

Ouch is right! Mom-remember that black bowl you got me for like a $1 at Wal-Mart? Well, the damn thing FLEW off my counter today and shattered into a million little pieces on the floor. I tried to be careful picking it up, but I did somehow manage to cut myself. No, it's not life threatening, and doesn't require stitches. It does hurt though, and as I watched it bleed (sick, huh?), I realized it could be misconstued as cutting. Self-mutilating. Whatever the kids are calling it nowadays. If I was a real cutter, I wouldn't be whining about how much it hurts, rather, I'd be telling you some BS line about how cutting releases my pain, stuff like that....yes, I have worked in the mental health world for too long. I'm gonna go nurse my wound now, aka, go put a Band-Aid on it.